Dr. Ethan Kross

Well, it's not just you. This is a pretty automatic response that most of us have when we encounter that kind of noxious response. And the inverse is true as well. I just got back from overseas and I was walking through the international terminal and I walked through this store that I've relabeled the emotion regulation emporium. Why have I relabeled it?

Well, it's not just you. This is a pretty automatic response that most of us have when we encounter that kind of noxious response. And the inverse is true as well. I just got back from overseas and I was walking through the international terminal and I walked through this store that I've relabeled the emotion regulation emporium. Why have I relabeled it?

Because all they sell are these sprays that we spritz all over us to manage how other people feel about us and how we feel about ourselves. Perfume and cologne, right? Like you just get a whiff of that stuff and, ah, let's go, let's go a little bit darker though. That's, so that's one category of automatic responses. Like I cannot control what I'm going to encounter, uh,

Because all they sell are these sprays that we spritz all over us to manage how other people feel about us and how we feel about ourselves. Perfume and cologne, right? Like you just get a whiff of that stuff and, ah, let's go, let's go a little bit darker though. That's, so that's one category of automatic responses. Like I cannot control what I'm going to encounter, uh,

Because all they sell are these sprays that we spritz all over us to manage how other people feel about us and how we feel about ourselves. Perfume and cologne, right? Like you just get a whiff of that stuff and, ah, let's go, let's go a little bit darker though. That's, so that's one category of automatic responses. Like I cannot control what I'm going to encounter, uh,

Some have some experience, a sensory experience that pushes my emotions around. No control over that. What about or I mean, I guess I could choose to evade certain people that might smell us our way. But inevitably, I'm going to come across someone. Let's talk about dark thoughts for a second. So have you ever experienced a thought? It just popped up in your head to seemingly randomly.

Some have some experience, a sensory experience that pushes my emotions around. No control over that. What about or I mean, I guess I could choose to evade certain people that might smell us our way. But inevitably, I'm going to come across someone. Let's talk about dark thoughts for a second. So have you ever experienced a thought? It just popped up in your head to seemingly randomly.

Some have some experience, a sensory experience that pushes my emotions around. No control over that. What about or I mean, I guess I could choose to evade certain people that might smell us our way. But inevitably, I'm going to come across someone. Let's talk about dark thoughts for a second. So have you ever experienced a thought? It just popped up in your head to seemingly randomly.

You have no idea why. But it's a dark thought of sorts. It's something that you wouldn't want to readily admit to someone else. You're kind of embarrassed by it.

You have no idea why. But it's a dark thought of sorts. It's something that you wouldn't want to readily admit to someone else. You're kind of embarrassed by it.

You have no idea why. But it's a dark thought of sorts. It's something that you wouldn't want to readily admit to someone else. You're kind of embarrassed by it.

Well, you know, you are not alone. So there's research on this that describes this as close to a universal experience. We have these thoughts that just pop up in our heads. We don't always know why. Sometimes we could come up with explanations for it. I'll give you a fun example to stick with the physical fitness example or comparison.

Well, you know, you are not alone. So there's research on this that describes this as close to a universal experience. We have these thoughts that just pop up in our heads. We don't always know why. Sometimes we could come up with explanations for it. I'll give you a fun example to stick with the physical fitness example or comparison.

Well, you know, you are not alone. So there's research on this that describes this as close to a universal experience. We have these thoughts that just pop up in our heads. We don't always know why. Sometimes we could come up with explanations for it. I'll give you a fun example to stick with the physical fitness example or comparison.

So when I'm in the gym, I will often have a thought when I'm carrying an exceptionally heavy dumbbell. It's like really heavy, just to be clear. When I'm carrying that dumbbell from one side of the gym to the next, I'll often imagine dropping it on a person's face that lies near my path. That's a dark thought, right? Why am I thinking about dropping a dumbbell on someone else's face?

So when I'm in the gym, I will often have a thought when I'm carrying an exceptionally heavy dumbbell. It's like really heavy, just to be clear. When I'm carrying that dumbbell from one side of the gym to the next, I'll often imagine dropping it on a person's face that lies near my path. That's a dark thought, right? Why am I thinking about dropping a dumbbell on someone else's face?

So when I'm in the gym, I will often have a thought when I'm carrying an exceptionally heavy dumbbell. It's like really heavy, just to be clear. When I'm carrying that dumbbell from one side of the gym to the next, I'll often imagine dropping it on a person's face that lies near my path. That's a dark thought, right? Why am I thinking about dropping a dumbbell on someone else's face?

It's probably adaptive. I don't want to drop it on their face. So this is a thought that's cuing me into the possibility of what might happen if I do. So it leads me to switch arms. I don't have control. I'm not purposefully thinking about that, right? Other kinds of thoughts like that pop up all the time in all of our minds.

It's probably adaptive. I don't want to drop it on their face. So this is a thought that's cuing me into the possibility of what might happen if I do. So it leads me to switch arms. I don't have control. I'm not purposefully thinking about that, right? Other kinds of thoughts like that pop up all the time in all of our minds.

It's probably adaptive. I don't want to drop it on their face. So this is a thought that's cuing me into the possibility of what might happen if I do. So it leads me to switch arms. I don't have control. I'm not purposefully thinking about that, right? Other kinds of thoughts like that pop up all the time in all of our minds.