Dr. Jenny Taitz

Like, your pain...

And again, this is so interesting.

It's like the things that people tell us would make us like enraged, but then we tell them to ourselves on repeat.

I've seen so many young adults whose parents are like, you have nothing to be upset about.

Look at all the problems and look at how good you have it.

And they're like, want to throw a book at their parents, but throw the phone at their parents, you know, but it's like when we tell it to ourselves all the time, I mean, I think both things are true.

Like I have every reason to be upset.

And also there's really big problems in the world.

And it could also be helpful to be able to learn.

One of the things I talk about is also observing and describing your emotions.

Like I could say, you know, this thing that happened to me on a zero to five scale is a two and being, you know, in a war zone right now would understandably be like a five plus, like on a, you know, five being the highest.

And so they're both things, you know, we don't want to minimize our experience, but we also want to have some perspective.

Sure.

There's research that finds that, you know, there's so much about emotion regulation is about appraisal.

Like when we're excited, if you think about a time that you're really revved up, even maybe exercising or something like.

it could be joyful to have your heart rate up and to feel even like, you know, if you're laughing really hard, maybe your face is flushed.

But oftentimes if we are in a different situation, the same physical sensations, we interpret the same physical sensations negatively.

And so telling ourselves we need to calm down, especially if we're revved up, isn't helpful, but kind of channeling that into like, this matters to me, I care about this, my body stress response is helpful.

can be really empowering.

And there's actually a lot of work on adopting like a synergistic mindset around stress.