Dr. Kendall Crowns

She was a great neighbor, never there, kept to herself.

When she was there, she was always quiet.

During my first semester of school, my upstairs neighbor was also very quiet.

He was in his final year of school, and he was never there as well, and I never heard him except maybe once or twice.

And because my apartment was so quiet, I studied there a lot.

It was convenient, I could get snacks, I could nap, and occasionally watch TV, and I developed quite a routine.

I went home for Christmas that year, and when I returned, I had a new upstairs neighbor.

I still remember his name, but because he isn't dead, maybe.

I'll refer to him as Lane.

Lane and I started medical school together.

My class size was 175 students, which is a big group of people, and you were always busy.

And due to that, I knew who he was, but I didn't know him.

And his last name was also further down the alphabet than mine.

And that meant we had no interaction in labs or clinical rotations.

Lane wasn't always in his apartment, but when he was, Lane liked to get drunk.

And when he was drunk, he liked to get loud.

And he liked to do this at all hours of the day.

I remember one time, at 2 a.m., he sat on his back porch blowing a Mardi Gras horn for over an hour.

Lane also liked to entertain strippers from a local strip club called Bazookas at his apartment.

Sometimes he would be having extracurricular activities with them late at night, and it would also get awful loud.