Dr. Kristin Carothers

See? And if he doesn't come, you're sad. Because you're like, I'm not going to be able to push myself to have fun the way I have fun with Trevor.

See? And if he doesn't come, you're sad. Because you're like, I'm not going to be able to push myself to have fun the way I have fun with Trevor.

Yes. Coercive cycle of interaction. There's a term for it.

Yes. Coercive cycle of interaction. There's a term for it.

You are reinforced by your coercive behaviors. And this is what we teach in behavioral parent management training. Another plug for an evidence-based intervention for ADHD. So in behavioral parent management training, the first step is teaching parents about the coercive cycle of interaction and how their kids are reinforced to continue arguing because they eventually get what they want.

You are reinforced by your coercive behaviors. And this is what we teach in behavioral parent management training. Another plug for an evidence-based intervention for ADHD. So in behavioral parent management training, the first step is teaching parents about the coercive cycle of interaction and how their kids are reinforced to continue arguing because they eventually get what they want.

And parents are reinforced to be more punitive because they eventually get what they want. So when you get when you've done that as a child with your parent and then you get into a relationship and you're like, I can prove that I'm right. I can get you to see. That the way I'm thinking is the way you should be thinking. And you just continue to engage in this spiral until you win.

And parents are reinforced to be more punitive because they eventually get what they want. So when you get when you've done that as a child with your parent and then you get into a relationship and you're like, I can prove that I'm right. I can get you to see. That the way I'm thinking is the way you should be thinking. And you just continue to engage in this spiral until you win.

And the other person is pissed. Oh, they gave up because they're exhausted. They're exhausted most of the time.

And the other person is pissed. Oh, they gave up because they're exhausted. They're exhausted most of the time.

And you'll be like, can you just stop? And they're like, no. So instead of telling them to stop, you'd give them the positive opposite behavior, the to-do behavior. So instead of, would you stop talking? It's, can we take a quiet moment? Can you be quiet? What do I want you to do? Okay. So instead of stop arguing, can we change the subject?

And you'll be like, can you just stop? And they're like, no. So instead of telling them to stop, you'd give them the positive opposite behavior, the to-do behavior. So instead of, would you stop talking? It's, can we take a quiet moment? Can you be quiet? What do I want you to do? Okay. So instead of stop arguing, can we change the subject?

Or sometimes you got to kind of just turn away and like wait to catch them being good and then turn back. Like if you're taking me down that spiral where you're trying to argue with me, I'm going to like turn away, pretend to do something else. And then the minute you get quiet, even if it's by accident, thanks Trevor for being quiet.

Or sometimes you got to kind of just turn away and like wait to catch them being good and then turn back. Like if you're taking me down that spiral where you're trying to argue with me, I'm going to like turn away, pretend to do something else. And then the minute you get quiet, even if it's by accident, thanks Trevor for being quiet.

And you're not an ADHD person. You are a person with a neurodivergent brain.

And you're not an ADHD person. You are a person with a neurodivergent brain.

You are, no, seriously, it makes a difference.

You are, no, seriously, it makes a difference.

You are Trevor who happens to have a brain that is neurodivergent.

You are Trevor who happens to have a brain that is neurodivergent.