Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett

There are so many experiments showing such... I mean, I just saw a set of experiments from one of my former postdocs that was just amazing. where she looked at glucose metabolism in mothers and babies. And I think she also did it in dating partners, if I'm not mistaken. And she looked at them alone and then together, like alone during a task and then together during a task.

There are so many experiments showing such... I mean, I just saw a set of experiments from one of my former postdocs that was just amazing. where she looked at glucose metabolism in mothers and babies. And I think she also did it in dating partners, if I'm not mistaken. And she looked at them alone and then together, like alone during a task and then together during a task.

And mothers and babies that are attached well, they're actually, their glucose metabolism is more efficient, like literally more efficient. And I believe she... I believe she also showed this with dating partners too. You know, there are these studies, these old studies showing that, that, you know,

And mothers and babies that are attached well, they're actually, their glucose metabolism is more efficient, like literally more efficient. And I believe she... I believe she also showed this with dating partners too. You know, there are these studies, these old studies showing that, that, you know,

It's like less calorically demanding to walk up a hill with a backpack if you're with a friend than if you're with a stranger. I mean, there's all these really batshit crazy findings. But if you realize that humans are literally affecting each other on a physical basis, whether they're aware of it or not, whether they intend it or not, it's completely irrelevant.

It's like less calorically demanding to walk up a hill with a backpack if you're with a friend than if you're with a stranger. I mean, there's all these really batshit crazy findings. But if you realize that humans are literally affecting each other on a physical basis, whether they're aware of it or not, whether they intend it or not, it's completely irrelevant.

Or it's unnecessary, I would say, to have that effect, to have the effects be there. Yeah. then it starts to make sense. You know, like the idea that, and again, meta-analyses show that you will live years longer, years on average, years longer if you have a social life filled with people who you trust and who trust you.

Or it's unnecessary, I would say, to have that effect, to have the effects be there. Yeah. then it starts to make sense. You know, like the idea that, and again, meta-analyses show that you will live years longer, years on average, years longer if you have a social life filled with people who you trust and who trust you.

Yeah. Sometimes she still says this to me, actually. She'll say, can you just be my friend for a minute and not my mother? I'll be like, yes, I can. And then I actually have to do it, which is sometimes hard. Or I will say to her, This is for parents. Anybody who has an adolescent or an adult child, this is like one of my, I don't know how I came up with this, but it's like golden, right?

Yeah. Sometimes she still says this to me, actually. She'll say, can you just be my friend for a minute and not my mother? I'll be like, yes, I can. And then I actually have to do it, which is sometimes hard. Or I will say to her, This is for parents. Anybody who has an adolescent or an adult child, this is like one of my, I don't know how I came up with this, but it's like golden, right?

I say to her, I'm having a mother moment where I feel the need to nag you about something. And if I can just nag you for a minute about it, I won't need to tell you again. So I'm basically asking her permission. Can I tell you this thing, which I really want to tell you, and I know you don't want to hear it, but you would be doing me a real kindness if you would just listen to me for a minute.

I say to her, I'm having a mother moment where I feel the need to nag you about something. And if I can just nag you for a minute about it, I won't need to tell you again. So I'm basically asking her permission. Can I tell you this thing, which I really want to tell you, and I know you don't want to hear it, but you would be doing me a real kindness if you would just listen to me for a minute.

And I know it's me. It's all me. It's not you. It's all on me. This is me. But I just, it would be better if you could just let me. And most of the time she says, you know, with great forbearance, right? Like, sure, mama, go ahead. Sometimes she says, not today. And then I actually have to listen, you know? So, yeah. But there were probably other things I'm not thinking of right now.

And I know it's me. It's all me. It's not you. It's all on me. This is me. But I just, it would be better if you could just let me. And most of the time she says, you know, with great forbearance, right? Like, sure, mama, go ahead. Sometimes she says, not today. And then I actually have to listen, you know? So, yeah. But there were probably other things I'm not thinking of right now.

I've written them all down because a lot of people have asked me this question. And what I like to say is this is, I'm not a physician. I'm not a psychiatrist. This is not a recommendation or recipe for your children. I'm just telling you what I did as a scientist.

I've written them all down because a lot of people have asked me this question. And what I like to say is this is, I'm not a physician. I'm not a psychiatrist. This is not a recommendation or recipe for your children. I'm just telling you what I did as a scientist.

Yes, but it's, again, it's... It's what you did for your daughter at that time. Yeah, just as a person who had read the literature, it's not medical advice. I'm really strongly... And also, I should say... You can't force your adolescent to do anything. You can't even force your kids really to do anything unless you threaten them with physical harm.

Yes, but it's, again, it's... It's what you did for your daughter at that time. Yeah, just as a person who had read the literature, it's not medical advice. I'm really strongly... And also, I should say... You can't force your adolescent to do anything. You can't even force your kids really to do anything unless you threaten them with physical harm.

They have to make that choice themselves, right?

They have to make that choice themselves, right?