Dr. Nicole LePera

Because a lot of these adaptations are aspects of ourself that we don't just want to throw away because they were an early adaptation, right?

Drive can absolutely be harnessed in moments where I also give myself rest.

I don't have to be

So I think it's important to and where I get to in my book is that the goal of all of this isn't to erase our childhood or become someone different.

It's to expand to allow all aspects of who we had to be, but also who we want to become.

So the individual development model is kind of my way of thinking of the answer to, I think, a question that maybe all of us ask, which is, why am I who I am?

How did I become me?

Who is me?

And there's many different theorists who theorize or came up with their idea of how we became who we are.

And what I saw lacking in those models was kind of back to what I was saying earlier, which was the impact and role of our environment, relationships included, and how it impacts our neurophysiological development.

So the individual developmental model is kind of five different spheres of

That all of us as a developing human, right, kind of go through, so to speak, based on kind of core needs at certain times.

Beginning with our body, right, being back to this idea of we're completely dependent.

We can't even feel safe, contrary to what was even possible.

Popular parenting wisdom up until recently, a child can't soothe themselves on their own, right?

They need a calm, grounded caregiver to show up when they're upset, crying, dysregulated, hungry, tired, or whatever to be soothed their nervous system.

So with safety and security being the first kind of foundational area, again, that is so greatly impacted by who, if anyone was around when we needed them.

Mm-hmm.

And then more so how safe they were, right, as a person to calm us down where they regulated enough to actually send those signals to our body through co-regulation of our nervous system to calm us down when we needed it.

And then we kind of progress through development, right, once safety and security happens.