Dr. Paul Conti

So I want to go look at that and say some of those lessons that I learned of like, be nice to people, open the door if someone's behind you.

You know what?

I want to keep that with me.

But to feel ashamed of myself and weak because I have sadness in me, like I don't want to carry that lesson for me.

And I say this often, each of our brains is more complex than the most powerful supercomputer.

But also our brains don't do very simple things that old computers would do, where you'd reboot the computer and it finds patches.

Right?

Our brains don't do that.

We don't wake up in the morning and our brain reboots when we say, oh, right, that lesson that I learned when I was a kid isn't right.

No, we carry that lesson with us.

So we have to be intentional about it.

We have to go back and look and say, look, I don't want to carry that forward.

with me anymore.

I'm not going to feel ashamed that I have feelings.

It's not what I communicate to the world around me.

It's not what I want my children to understand about the world around them.

And I don't want that inside of me.

Now I can use self-determination, which might say if immediately, if I become aware that I'm

I'm not sharing sad feelings, say, and, you know, it's really been driving my mood down or it's been driving some unhealthy behavior, alcohol use, risk-taking, right?

And I say, well, why is that happening?