Dr Paul Eastwick

These are really the critical things that people need to feel.

A lot of that ends up getting wrapped up.

You know, if you're in a relationship, it gets wrapped up in like your daily goals and like, how do I support you with the things you want to do?

But are my needs being met?

These things get very complicated very, very quickly.

But the essence of attachment is essentially this sense like I am here for you.

I trust that you're here for me.

And like I'm kind of willing to do everything in my power, you know, within reason to support you.

Right.

Yeah, exactly.

Thinking about it in those sort of twin forms of support is very, very helpful.

Yeah.

I mean, breakups are tough because not only...

have you lost something valuable to you, lost something that you cared about.

You have also probably lost the person that you would normally go to in the cases where you had lost something that you cared about.

So it's like this double whammy of stress.

And this is why like when people go through breakups, they can't sleep, they don't eat

maybe at all, they certainly aren't eating well.

Their immune systems are kind of a mess.

Like your body goes into fight or flight, but there's nothing to fight or flee.