Dr. Sue Varma

look at their relationships and the quality of their relationships in their 40s and 50s, and that the quality of our health and the quality of our life depends on the quality of our relationships, because it's so easy when you're in the sandwich generation to not invest in your friendships.

And like you said, I think about retirement.

I mean, I'm still early, but I think, where would it be?

And I'm so glad you said that to me, the beautiful place, because my husband, we were in Italy, and I was like, oh my God, I could live here, you know?

And then I was thinking, but then I would be away from all my friends.

So you could take the beautiful place.

And obviously, there's ways to integrate both travel and friendships.

But I think that's one of the things that has become on the back burner.

Like, I'm very social, but do I make it a number one priority, my friendships?

Not as much as I should.

So, you know, you're making me think about that when you're talking about what is best in retirement.

Is it the mountains or is it the friendships?

Ideally, you have both.

But I do think friendships are a key part of the health.

Yes.

So first of all, it has to come from a place of love, of curiosity, of openness, non-judgmental, and really trying to understand a day in the life of the elderly person and saying, you know, I want to come and spend time with you.

Because I think in a lot of cultures, there's expectations that are

Kids are going to take care of us.

But understanding what the expectations are, because if you're trying to give advice, they're like, well, you're not here.

And the reality is, yes, I have my own life.