Dr. Sunita Sah

And these were the types of messages I received, not just from parents, but teachers and community. They were to be good, to fit in, obey, not make a fuss, don't question authority. And many of us receive these messages and we equate being good. compliant with being good and defiance with being bad. And when I delved into it in more detail, I discovered some problems with that.

For example, one survey found that only one in 10 healthcare workers, many of them nurses, felt comfortable speaking up when they saw their colleague making an error or taking a shortcut. And findings from another survey of over 1,700 crew members on commercial airlines found that only 50% of them felt comfortable speaking up when they noticed a mistake. So these are huge problems.

For example, one survey found that only one in 10 healthcare workers, many of them nurses, felt comfortable speaking up when they saw their colleague making an error or taking a shortcut. And findings from another survey of over 1,700 crew members on commercial airlines found that only 50% of them felt comfortable speaking up when they noticed a mistake. So these are huge problems.

For example, one survey found that only one in 10 healthcare workers, many of them nurses, felt comfortable speaking up when they saw their colleague making an error or taking a shortcut. And findings from another survey of over 1,700 crew members on commercial airlines found that only 50% of them felt comfortable speaking up when they noticed a mistake. So these are huge problems.

And I started to wonder, what if it's sometimes bad to be good? What do we sacrifice by always trying to be so compliant and so polite? And that was a question that really inspired a lot of my work and research. I often felt drained and muted by looking after everybody else's feelings and keeping silent when you know something is wrong can become soul destroying.

And I started to wonder, what if it's sometimes bad to be good? What do we sacrifice by always trying to be so compliant and so polite? And that was a question that really inspired a lot of my work and research. I often felt drained and muted by looking after everybody else's feelings and keeping silent when you know something is wrong can become soul destroying.

And I started to wonder, what if it's sometimes bad to be good? What do we sacrifice by always trying to be so compliant and so polite? And that was a question that really inspired a lot of my work and research. I often felt drained and muted by looking after everybody else's feelings and keeping silent when you know something is wrong can become soul destroying.

So I spent decades studying this and what I found that is crucial and substantially changed how I think is that we have misunderstood what it means to defy.

So I spent decades studying this and what I found that is crucial and substantially changed how I think is that we have misunderstood what it means to defy.

So I spent decades studying this and what I found that is crucial and substantially changed how I think is that we have misunderstood what it means to defy.

Yeah, absolutely. Which is why I came to this revelation that we need a new definition for defiance. So the old definition in the Oxford English Dictionary is to defy is to challenge the power of another person to resist boldly and openly defiance. And I'm not one to usually disagree with the Oxford English Dictionary. I was raised in the UK after all.

Yeah, absolutely. Which is why I came to this revelation that we need a new definition for defiance. So the old definition in the Oxford English Dictionary is to defy is to challenge the power of another person to resist boldly and openly defiance. And I'm not one to usually disagree with the Oxford English Dictionary. I was raised in the UK after all.

Yeah, absolutely. Which is why I came to this revelation that we need a new definition for defiance. So the old definition in the Oxford English Dictionary is to defy is to challenge the power of another person to resist boldly and openly defiance. And I'm not one to usually disagree with the Oxford English Dictionary. I was raised in the UK after all.

But I think that definition is way too narrow. And my definition is that to defy is to act in accordance with your true values when there is pressure to do otherwise. So defiance is actually reframed as a proactive, positive force in society. Because if you think about it, Mike, all our individual actions of consent and dissent, they create the society that we live in.

But I think that definition is way too narrow. And my definition is that to defy is to act in accordance with your true values when there is pressure to do otherwise. So defiance is actually reframed as a proactive, positive force in society. Because if you think about it, Mike, all our individual actions of consent and dissent, they create the society that we live in.

But I think that definition is way too narrow. And my definition is that to defy is to act in accordance with your true values when there is pressure to do otherwise. So defiance is actually reframed as a proactive, positive force in society. Because if you think about it, Mike, all our individual actions of consent and dissent, they create the society that we live in.

So it affects our lives, our workplaces, our communities. And that's why I'm so passionate about it.

So it affects our lives, our workplaces, our communities. And that's why I'm so passionate about it.

So it affects our lives, our workplaces, our communities. And that's why I'm so passionate about it.

Well, what I've found is that we tend to actively resist defiance. And there's three key reasons for why this happens. So first of all, we feel enormous pressure to go along with other people for a variety of reasons, like we're conditioned to comply.