Dr. Tara Swart

But one of the things I think is so, so important for dating is that if a couple are getting to know each other, and this is all on heterosexual couples in research, then as a woman is sexually interested and liking the guy and enjoying the dating, her oxytocin levels is like slowly, slowly starting to go up.

But one of the things I think is so, so important for dating is that if a couple are getting to know each other, and this is all on heterosexual couples in research, then as a woman is sexually interested and liking the guy and enjoying the dating, her oxytocin levels is like slowly, slowly starting to go up.

When they start actually having sex, she's gonna be releasing higher levels of oxytocin every time she orgasms, and that's gonna make her bond to the guy much more. If you have sex on the first date, The guy's vasopressin levels will plummet straight away and all he'll be interested in is testosterone. If you make him wait, his vasopressin and oxytocin levels go up.

When they start actually having sex, she's gonna be releasing higher levels of oxytocin every time she orgasms, and that's gonna make her bond to the guy much more. If you have sex on the first date, The guy's vasopressin levels will plummet straight away and all he'll be interested in is testosterone. If you make him wait, his vasopressin and oxytocin levels go up.

And then when you do actually have sex, he's already bonded. So it's more likely to become part of a loving relationship.

And then when you do actually have sex, he's already bonded. So it's more likely to become part of a loving relationship.

Because the vasopressin levels drop as soon as he has sex.

Because the vasopressin levels drop as soon as he has sex.

So vasopressin is the one that makes the prairie voles monogamous. The higher the levels of that and that the receptors appear in the reward circuitry of your brain. And so basically if you see your partner in distress, it affects your brain, those neurons, and you want to comfort her through physical touch. So that's oxytocin. But...

So vasopressin is the one that makes the prairie voles monogamous. The higher the levels of that and that the receptors appear in the reward circuitry of your brain. And so basically if you see your partner in distress, it affects your brain, those neurons, and you want to comfort her through physical touch. So that's oxytocin. But...

If you haven't had time for those receptors to appear in the correct place to make you bond, then it goes back to lust. So what I say about love and relationships is that the genetics and the receptors will load the gun, but sexual activity will pull the trigger.

If you haven't had time for those receptors to appear in the correct place to make you bond, then it goes back to lust. So what I say about love and relationships is that the genetics and the receptors will load the gun, but sexual activity will pull the trigger.

But if that's what you want, that's fine.

But if that's what you want, that's fine.

No, no. And don't say it's fine and it's fun if you actually want a long-term relationship and then be disappointed that they didn't want that too.

No, no. And don't say it's fine and it's fun if you actually want a long-term relationship and then be disappointed that they didn't want that too.

And it changes in a different way if they wait and they actually create a bond. First. Yeah.

And it changes in a different way if they wait and they actually create a bond. First. Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.