Elisabeth McKay

I would never give something just to get something in return.

a person like this is very much going to do that, right?

Because everything is measured and tit for tat and they're looking to prove reciprocity.

So if we're looking at a person like this, we have to really remember that if someone gives something freely and we let them do that on their own terms naturally, we can really rest in the peace and security of what we were given.

If we feel like we have to be neurotic and push for it or demand it, is it even worth it at that point?

And this is a great example.

And I'm sure we see a lot of caricatures of this on the movies, but the kind of caricature of a girlfriend that's been waiting for years for her boyfriend to propose, all of her other friends are getting married.

If you have to push your partner to propose to you, wouldn't that proposal not even feel good anymore?

To a person that experiences jealousy, that whole plot that I just gave you might totally... For them, it's more about getting it than how they got it.

For a person like me, if I had to push to get something, getting it would feel so empty.

I'd be like, what did I even... For me, if I need help and it's clear that I need help, if I have to beg for it, at that point, I don't want you to help me anymore.

If you didn't want to do it freely, then don't do it.

But a person that is unfortunately looping on jealousy functions very much the opposite.

They're willing to be pushy, demanding, manipulative to get what they feel that they're owed.

And there is an aspect of this that is very clearly entrenched in entitlement and self-centeredness.

Let me ask you a question.

Have you ever noticed how you can know something is unhealthy and still do it anyways?

You know you shouldn't react that way in an argument.

You know that habit isn't good for you.

You know that that thought pattern is irrational.