Em Gessen

But this drive marks a turning point.

O is in the car with Priscilla and Alan is in detention in Canada.

Who knows where Lena is?

For the first time in two and a half years, no one is coming between Priscilla and her son.

In fact, after Alan has so grossly violated their temporary custody agreement, Priscilla now has full legal and physical custody of O. And I'm trying to imagine, what would I do in this situation?

What would you do?

Would you eviscerate the bastard?

Or would you say that he was taking a time out because he'd broken the rules, like in school?

I suppose Priscilla expected Alan to be in the kids' lives after this, despite all he'd done.

But then, six months later, when Alan was arrested for hiring someone to murder her, she continued taking uncanny care with the way she talked to the kids about him.

She said that he was arrested because he broke the rules again.

And almost a year later, when we were talking in her little house, she still hadn't told the kids that Alan had tried to have her killed.

Part of it was that she hadn't figured out a way to talk about it that wouldn't scare the kids.

But that wasn't all of it.

Priscilla told me that she wasn't only protecting the kids.

I've tried to understand how she can feel that way towards someone who tried to have her killed.

I thought maybe she still loved him.

She did tell me that she still felt something for him.

And that part of her was hoping that what he had done wasn't true.

That some explanation would emerge that would make her feel a little saner and safer.