Em Gessen

I've never seen Lena throw a tantrum, but I've seen that when it comes to Alan, Lena often got her way.

My Aunt Lena didn't want to talk to me for this podcast, though she talked to me about Priscilla quite a bit before Alan's arrest.

There was one time she asked me for advice.

How do I get Priscilla out of O's life?

I counseled against trying.

She seemed to take me back.

Several years after that exchange, Priscilla and O moved to Moscow with Alan.

And this was when Lena got particularly assertive, especially when it came to O.

For instance, Priscilla says Lena didn't like the trilingual preschool that she and Alan had chosen for three-year-old O. So one day, Priscilla returned from a short trip to Zimbabwe to find that Alan had taken O out of the preschool and put him in a Russian language one, where he couldn't understand the other kids and Priscilla couldn't communicate with the teachers.

Priscilla reversed the decision, but she thought I had Lena written all over it.

Did you feel like Lena was trying to push you out of your life?

Things between Priscilla and Alan continued in their familiar cycle of misery.

And there was also physical violence, which Alan doesn't deny.

Priscilla had had enough.

Alan prided himself on solving complicated problems, but listening to Priscilla, I had the impression that she was the one who could be practical under stress.

She was about to have a baby with a surrogate in a strange country while her marriage was falling apart, and she seemed to just know that she could get through it.

She was stuck in Moscow, but she didn't have to be stuck with Alan.

They tried living together apart in a giant apartment.

That didn't work.

Alan started staying with Lena in what used to be our grandmother's apartment.