Erinn Hayes

Bridal Body.

Bridal Body.

I wanted to look and feel my best at my wedding.

What bride doesn't?

So three months before the big day, I stripped naked, stepped in front of the mirror, and took stock of my goals.

I had work to do, no doubt about it.

My hips have always been my biggest problem area.

I definitely needed to do something about them.

Same with my stomach and, of course, my neck tattoo, which says, property of chainsaw.

I traced my fingers over the faded script, sighing in disgust.

I don't care how good a kisser your ninth grade boyfriend is, never get a tattoo of his name outside the bikini area.

These problems weren't going to magically fix themselves, so I decided to join a gym and booked a session with a personal trainer named Diego.

After we'd introduced ourselves, Diego asked me about my fitness goals, and I told him that my wedding was in three months, and I wanted toned arms, a flat stomach, and sculpted legs.

He told me he'd like a nine-inch cock that prints money.

I thought that was harsh.

But...

I had to respect his tough love approach, and I realized it might be just the ticket.

Diego walked me over to the machines and instructed me to jog on a treadmill while he tracked my time by playing Grand Theft Auto IV on his phone.

I logged 30 minutes, and then we set up a schedule where we'd meet twice a week.

He also suggested I clean up my diet by drinking more water and prioritizing lean protein.