Gabby Bernstein

It's like, how could a child, you can't understand it. Your brain's not able to process it. Most adult brains don't have the ability to process that. Or most parents would say, you're fine, you're fine. Just get shut down. If you even did bring it to somebody, you'd be shut down, right? Especially with, or in cases of, you know, real extreme trauma, you don't feel safe enough to talk about it.

It's like, how could a child, you can't understand it. Your brain's not able to process it. Most adult brains don't have the ability to process that. Or most parents would say, you're fine, you're fine. Just get shut down. If you even did bring it to somebody, you'd be shut down, right? Especially with, or in cases of, you know, real extreme trauma, you don't feel safe enough to talk about it.

Shut it down. Then you build up these protection mechanisms, protector parts. And there's two types of protector parts. But in my book, I really just focus on one type. So we'll stay close to that. There's managers and firefighters. And so the managers are who we talk about in the book. Because the firefighters are who I want people to go to therapy to work with. But the managers are...

Shut it down. Then you build up these protection mechanisms, protector parts. And there's two types of protector parts. But in my book, I really just focus on one type. So we'll stay close to that. There's managers and firefighters. And so the managers are who we talk about in the book. Because the firefighters are who I want people to go to therapy to work with. But the managers are...

The control-free, you know, for me, I'm just gonna name my managers, you know, like one would be like Knives Out is another one I named. Like if you with me, I'm like Knives Are Out. Like, you know, like, you know. Destroy you, yeah. That's a manager. Vigilance was a manager for me. Just sort of like anxiety was kind of a manager for me. Think about it, anxiety, right?

The control-free, you know, for me, I'm just gonna name my managers, you know, like one would be like Knives Out is another one I named. Like if you with me, I'm like Knives Are Out. Like, you know, like, you know. Destroy you, yeah. That's a manager. Vigilance was a manager for me. Just sort of like anxiety was kind of a manager for me. Think about it, anxiety, right?

If I'm anxious and I'm, you know, moving, moving, moving so fast, like when you first met me, totally out of my body, hadn't remembered the trauma yet, totally scared. It's been a crime when I think about that time, you know. That anxiety was actually a form of protection.

If I'm anxious and I'm, you know, moving, moving, moving so fast, like when you first met me, totally out of my body, hadn't remembered the trauma yet, totally scared. It's been a crime when I think about that time, you know. That anxiety was actually a form of protection.

Because if I'm in an anxious state, I don't have to feel the horror and the fear and terror of that other state. So that's a manager, the parts of us that are with us all day long, managing the big feelings of the exile. Okay.

Because if I'm in an anxious state, I don't have to feel the horror and the fear and terror of that other state. So that's a manager, the parts of us that are with us all day long, managing the big feelings of the exile. Okay.

And then when the managers don't work anymore, like let's say something very big happens in your life, something extreme, and the managing is no longer working, that's when the firefighters come in. The firefighters will do whatever it takes to put out the fire of those impermissible feelings. And that's when you pick up the drugs, pick up the workaholism, pick up the

And then when the managers don't work anymore, like let's say something very big happens in your life, something extreme, and the managing is no longer working, that's when the firefighters come in. The firefighters will do whatever it takes to put out the fire of those impermissible feelings. And that's when you pick up the drugs, pick up the workaholism, pick up the

Alcohol, the sex, the porn, the binging, the extreme addictive parts of ourselves. And those are the most extreme parts of us are the ones that are working the hardest to keep us safe from those feelings. And then there's good news. You ready for the good news? Yeah. We all have an inner parent inside of us. So those are all the young children inside, right?

Alcohol, the sex, the porn, the binging, the extreme addictive parts of ourselves. And those are the most extreme parts of us are the ones that are working the hardest to keep us safe from those feelings. And then there's good news. You ready for the good news? Yeah. We all have an inner parent inside of us. So those are all the young children inside, right?

The exiles, the managers, the firefighters, right? The protectors and the exiles. They're all like running our world, right? Where like one trigger happens, this protector shows up. Another trigger happens, it's like protector to protector. It's like a boxing match all day long. Walking through life.

The exiles, the managers, the firefighters, right? The protectors and the exiles. They're all like running our world, right? Where like one trigger happens, this protector shows up. Another trigger happens, it's like protector to protector. It's like a boxing match all day long. Walking through life.

Exhausting. Why do people have burnout? Why do people have stress? Why do people have chronic pain? Of course, there's a whole chapter in the book called Body Parts. How the body, like physical pain is a protector.

Exhausting. Why do people have burnout? Why do people have stress? Why do people have chronic pain? Of course, there's a whole chapter in the book called Body Parts. How the body, like physical pain is a protector.

Like if I have back pain, I don't have to feel my childhood wounds. We're going to get into that. The good news is that we all have what Dick Schwartz has coined is self with a capital S. And self is our adult, undamaged, resourced part of who we are. It's the truth of who we are. It's the spirit of who we are. It's the God within us. It is an energy. And self has eight C qualities.

Like if I have back pain, I don't have to feel my childhood wounds. We're going to get into that. The good news is that we all have what Dick Schwartz has coined is self with a capital S. And self is our adult, undamaged, resourced part of who we are. It's the truth of who we are. It's the spirit of who we are. It's the God within us. It is an energy. And self has eight C qualities.