Gabby Windey

And for most and most, fascia is a contributor to cellulite.

My ears are perked.

My ears are perked.

So let me pull up my resources, even though this is mostly all alleged, in my opinion, all of those things.

Let's see, let's see, let's see.

Craig Latt says, the dimpled appearance is caused by fibrous connective tissue or septa, which tether the dermis to underlying fascia.

Sure, Craig, whatever you say.

Whatever you say, Craig, it seems like Craig is a reputable name and I shall listen to everything that comes out of your mouth.

So I guess these Kleenex and septal deviation is holding on to the fascia so tight, pulling at the skin and making inedible cottage cheese right under the butt cheek.

And you know what cottage cheese I'm talking about.

I'm not talking about your gonorrhea because that has a green color and can be fixed with the penicillin, but this cannot be fixed.

So, what does pseudoscience of the Fascia Blaster and inventor Ashley Black say?

Many websites report this is pseudoscience because there hasn't been enough research to call it science and it may or may not be FDA approved.

If thy shall release, blast thy fascia, we shall be free!

It promises to me in my own words.

Sold.

I went out of this prison with small dimples in my ass and a touch of the sagging of the knee on my knees because I haven't looked at a lunge in an eon.

And live at the crafty table at work.

Ooh, something called the crafty table, which I've just discovered.

Like the sixth, how many wonders?