Gene Simmons

Those are what's called perfect songs. Not only that, but... The title of the song is the first word of the song. It's the most memorable song. And it's the last word in the song. Yesterday. The last song. Because I believe in yesterday. Who writes songs like that? It's undeniable they're writing them. McCartney, especially, by far is the most successful songwriter in all of recorded history.

Those are what's called perfect songs. Not only that, but... The title of the song is the first word of the song. It's the most memorable song. And it's the last word in the song. Yesterday. The last song. Because I believe in yesterday. Who writes songs like that? It's undeniable they're writing them. McCartney, especially, by far is the most successful songwriter in all of recorded history.

There have been over a thousand different artists who've recorded just yesterday. Did you get to spend some time with them? With Ringo. What was that like? Well, there are two stories. In the Cher days, she used to have these disco roller skating parties where all the celebrities would go. And I didn't care. I mean, I appreciate you're lucky to be a celebrity. But oh, my God, it's Ursula Andress.

There have been over a thousand different artists who've recorded just yesterday. Did you get to spend some time with them? With Ringo. What was that like? Well, there are two stories. In the Cher days, she used to have these disco roller skating parties where all the celebrities would go. And I didn't care. I mean, I appreciate you're lucky to be a celebrity. But oh, my God, it's Ursula Andress.

I didn't care. I don't mean to be dismissive. It's just, oh, there's that person from that commercial TV show. And I'm sitting, because I didn't, you know, Jews on roller skates is hilarious. So I didn't. I just sat on the sidelines watching them, sat on top of the bowling, anyway, on the side with my legs going like this.

I didn't care. I don't mean to be dismissive. It's just, oh, there's that person from that commercial TV show. And I'm sitting, because I didn't, you know, Jews on roller skates is hilarious. So I didn't. I just sat on the sidelines watching them, sat on top of the bowling, anyway, on the side with my legs going like this.

And as everybody's roller skating, and then I saw two teenagers coming towards me. So I got up, because one of them's wearing a Kiss T-shirt with rhinestones. They're about 15. And they came up, and one's got a, I'm a big fave, you know, speak with an English accent. Oh, it's okay, sure. Doing an autograph. And then I look up, and in back of them, Ringo Starr starts coming towards them.

And as everybody's roller skating, and then I saw two teenagers coming towards me. So I got up, because one of them's wearing a Kiss T-shirt with rhinestones. They're about 15. And they came up, and one's got a, I'm a big fave, you know, speak with an English accent. Oh, it's okay, sure. Doing an autograph. And then I look up, and in back of them, Ringo Starr starts coming towards them.

And I'm, you know.

And I'm, you know.

But the Beatles, I couldn't shine their shoes. So Ringo comes up, puts his hand, puts his arms around them, and he says, I hope me boys aren't thinking. Ringo's sons are asking me for an autograph. Wow. I had to slap their little putz faces and say, how dare you talk to me? Your father's a Beatle. It happened again. We were playing.

But the Beatles, I couldn't shine their shoes. So Ringo comes up, puts his hand, puts his arms around them, and he says, I hope me boys aren't thinking. Ringo's sons are asking me for an autograph. Wow. I had to slap their little putz faces and say, how dare you talk to me? Your father's a Beatle. It happened again. We were playing.

Oh, one other time, we were having a party up in the Hollywood Hills, and Ringo had a L.A. manager at that time, a guy named Eric Gardner. And Shannon, my wifey and I, and I was eating salads. I hate salads. And I'm eating salads, and Ringo's coming up to say hello. And he sent me a birthday. He said, oh, happy birthday, Gene. If you can't tell me, you can't say how much that means to me.

Oh, one other time, we were having a party up in the Hollywood Hills, and Ringo had a L.A. manager at that time, a guy named Eric Gardner. And Shannon, my wifey and I, and I was eating salads. I hate salads. And I'm eating salads, and Ringo's coming up to say hello. And he sent me a birthday. He said, oh, happy birthday, Gene. If you can't tell me, you can't say how much that means to me.

And I'm eating. So I give her the thing. And he comes up to me. And I'm much bigger than he is. So I didn't know what to do. So I picked him up. And his feet are dank. Ringo's about 5'6", 5'7", I don't know, or maybe 5'. I'm 6'2". So I picked him up, you know, because I wanted to hold him. I don't know what else to do. I didn't want to shake his hand. And I'm smiling.

And I'm eating. So I give her the thing. And he comes up to me. And I'm much bigger than he is. So I didn't know what to do. So I picked him up. And his feet are dank. Ringo's about 5'6", 5'7", I don't know, or maybe 5'. I'm 6'2". So I picked him up, you know, because I wanted to hold him. I don't know what else to do. I didn't want to shake his hand. And I'm smiling.

I didn't even remember what I'm talking. And he said, would you put me down? So I put him down, and he walked off. All right. And I'm smiling, looking at Shannon. She goes, you got Godzilla-sized.

I didn't even remember what I'm talking. And he said, would you put me down? So I put him down, and he walked off. All right. And I'm smiling, looking at Shannon. She goes, you got Godzilla-sized.

Like a big thing sticking out. And I'm like, his face is right here. And... Yeah, just get over yourself, no matter who you are. If you're the Pope, I know you got to poop just like I do. I don't have that hierarchy thing. So I've met everybody from His Holiness to Dalai Lama to Presidents Clinton and Bush and everything. And they've achieved greatness in their field, but we all fart.

Like a big thing sticking out. And I'm like, his face is right here. And... Yeah, just get over yourself, no matter who you are. If you're the Pope, I know you got to poop just like I do. I don't have that hierarchy thing. So I've met everybody from His Holiness to Dalai Lama to Presidents Clinton and Bush and everything. And they've achieved greatness in their field, but we all fart.