Gillian Sandstrom
๐ค SpeakerAppearances Over Time
Podcast Appearances
And what we found was that people who'd had this just tiny little social interaction, you know, had treated the barista as if they would treat one who knew their name and knew their order. If they had that social interaction, they were in a better mood and they felt more satisfied with their Starbucks experience and they felt a greater sense of connection to other people.
And what we found was that people who'd had this just tiny little social interaction, you know, had treated the barista as if they would treat one who knew their name and knew their order. If they had that social interaction, they were in a better mood and they felt more satisfied with their Starbucks experience and they felt a greater sense of connection to other people.
What we find is that after two people talk for the first time, they each tend to think that the other person liked them less than they actually did. So we have this negative voice in our head that says, oh, why did I say that? Why did I not say that? Did they understand me? Did I embarrass myself? And we tend to listen to that negative voice and think that everything went horribly wrong.
What we find is that after two people talk for the first time, they each tend to think that the other person liked them less than they actually did. So we have this negative voice in our head that says, oh, why did I say that? Why did I not say that? Did they understand me? Did I embarrass myself? And we tend to listen to that negative voice and think that everything went horribly wrong.
What we find is that after two people talk for the first time, they each tend to think that the other person liked them less than they actually did. So we have this negative voice in our head that says, oh, why did I say that? Why did I not say that? Did they understand me? Did I embarrass myself? And we tend to listen to that negative voice and think that everything went horribly wrong.
But our partner doesn't have that say, you know, they're probably doing the same thing. Right. So they don't even notice the thing that you think went horribly wrong because they're stuck in their own head thinking about what they did wrong. And so I read the abstract that Erica was part of where she was talking about the liking gap. And I thought, oh, I have I have data. We should talk.
But our partner doesn't have that say, you know, they're probably doing the same thing. Right. So they don't even notice the thing that you think went horribly wrong because they're stuck in their own head thinking about what they did wrong. And so I read the abstract that Erica was part of where she was talking about the liking gap. And I thought, oh, I have I have data. We should talk.
But our partner doesn't have that say, you know, they're probably doing the same thing. Right. So they don't even notice the thing that you think went horribly wrong because they're stuck in their own head thinking about what they did wrong. And so I read the abstract that Erica was part of where she was talking about the liking gap. And I thought, oh, I have I have data. We should talk.
And so I reached out to her via email and we've been collaborating ever since. So it's a great example of reaching out to a stranger.
And so I reached out to her via email and we've been collaborating ever since. So it's a great example of reaching out to a stranger.
And so I reached out to her via email and we've been collaborating ever since. So it's a great example of reaching out to a stranger.
Yes, absolutely. And I think norms and those kind of cultural messages make a huge difference to what we do. I think it's really hard, isn't it? Because it's a very nuanced message that we want to convey because we don't want to make people scared to talk to others, but we do need to be aware of our personal safety.
Yes, absolutely. And I think norms and those kind of cultural messages make a huge difference to what we do. I think it's really hard, isn't it? Because it's a very nuanced message that we want to convey because we don't want to make people scared to talk to others, but we do need to be aware of our personal safety.
Yes, absolutely. And I think norms and those kind of cultural messages make a huge difference to what we do. I think it's really hard, isn't it? Because it's a very nuanced message that we want to convey because we don't want to make people scared to talk to others, but we do need to be aware of our personal safety.
And I'm not suggesting that people go down a dark alley and start talking to people, but in most situations, if you're in a public place surrounded by other people, there's so many benefits to talking to strangers.
And I'm not suggesting that people go down a dark alley and start talking to people, but in most situations, if you're in a public place surrounded by other people, there's so many benefits to talking to strangers.
And I'm not suggesting that people go down a dark alley and start talking to people, but in most situations, if you're in a public place surrounded by other people, there's so many benefits to talking to strangers.
Yes, this was one of the first conversations that I can remember sort of deliberately starting with a stranger. And if I think about it, I've definitely had conversations before then, but this is one that was really memorable to me, I think because it felt like I'd deliberately done it rather than it just sort of happening accidentally.
Yes, this was one of the first conversations that I can remember sort of deliberately starting with a stranger. And if I think about it, I've definitely had conversations before then, but this is one that was really memorable to me, I think because it felt like I'd deliberately done it rather than it just sort of happening accidentally.
Yes, this was one of the first conversations that I can remember sort of deliberately starting with a stranger. And if I think about it, I've definitely had conversations before then, but this is one that was really memorable to me, I think because it felt like I'd deliberately done it rather than it just sort of happening accidentally.