Goblin AKA Nick

It was literally just whatever YouTube paid me for my donations and my ad rev was...

my fucking net worth you know and i remember i would pay my rent which was 650 a month it went up to 1100 eventually when i moved but 650 a month the entire rest of that was weed zans ketamine blow i would just order it all and like the more money i had the more i just bought but then they keep scaling up yeah yeah it kept scaling up all the way until like it got really bad bro like it was

I'm kinda drunk right now, so it's not gonna be a great estimate, you know, I had some drinks at lunch, but probably like,

fall of 21, I'd say is when it got the worst.

And I was like staying up for like two or three days straight at a time.

And I would just be like sitting at my desk, like cold sweating, railing lines.

And I had this like I developed this really extreme like paranoia and anxiety in my brain from doing so much uppers that like I would do uppers to bring me like bring my heart rate back up because I was really paranoid about my heart.

Like I'd be like, oh, my shit's beating too slow.

I need to wake up.

Yeah.

Do a bunch of lines and I'd be like, oh, my shit's beating too fast.

I need to take a Xan.

I need to do a line of K. And I would go through cycles of that for like two or three days straight.

Just trying to get it back to just like a sober heart rate.

And the whole time it's like, bro, I'm not fucking dying.

Like, you know, but I was just so paranoid in my brain that I thought I was.

Bro, I had this big house by myself.

I had no friends in this town.

I had no job.

And like, the only thing I did all day was just sit inside and do drugs like all fucking day.