Helen Thorn

So that was really bizarre.

And like even a year later, a woman who knew her messaged me going, this is what your husband was doing.

He was sending her gifts and flowers and writing her poetry.

And you had no idea.

And so all this stuff kept revealing itself.

So it was bizarre.

And I think that's what really destroyed me.

This was the big change.

This was what kind of broke me.

And then we went into lockdown and, you know, I was with my kids.

And I think I had always, because I'd been brought up in a very

to be a good girl, to be Christian, to be, you know, have one man forever, all that sort of thing.

And it just completely blew up that thought of if you're only good, it will work out for you.

If you love hard enough, if you do all the effort in the relationship, and I realised I was mirroring my mum.

I was just allowing...

You know, not that I was responsible for his behavior, but I never challenged it.

I just thought if I keep being good, it will get better.

He'll love me more.

But there's nothing I could have done.

And I feel real peace about that, that he was determined to blow up his life.