Iris Mauss

I think it just came to a point where I was reading all that and I'm like, I can't do this.

And I realized in a way it was really...

not in my control because trying all these things hadn't yielded the expected hoped for effects.

So in a way, I hit a wall and I had to accept what was.

I didn't do anything differently, but my perspective on it changed.

And I let go of the ought to control it.

He ought to be peaceful.

He ought to go to sleep.

He ought to be happy.

And that perspective change was almost like a little magic because I

The moment I changed my perspective, that very moment, a lot of the tension just left.

he still cried.

So it didn't change anything about the crying per se, but the moments or the times of crying almost became pleasant.

I mean, it's weird to say that, but it was almost pleasant because it wasn't something that I had to make go away that I was layering all this judgment on, but rather it was something that we shared.

And I thought, well, he's

comfortable showing his distress to me.

And it sort of was an experience that we shared together and part of the richness of our relationship in a way, rather than something to try and avoid.

Yeah, so people differ in the degree to which they tend to accept their negative emotions.

So some people naturally do something that I had a hard time doing.

They encounter negative emotions and they don't judge them as good or bad.