Jake Haendel

Jake was desperate not to go back to Tewksbury and us basically having to convince the medical community that he'd be OK.

Jake was desperate not to go back to Tewksbury and us basically having to convince the medical community that he'd be OK.

We found an apartment in Cambridge. It's amazing how many places claim that they are ADA capable, they can handle disabled people. This place was totally no, except that he was still completely bedridden. So it didn't matter. It wasn't like he could go to the bathroom anyway, you know, get in a wheelchair and wheel over. It couldn't do any of that stuff.

We found an apartment in Cambridge. It's amazing how many places claim that they are ADA capable, they can handle disabled people. This place was totally no, except that he was still completely bedridden. So it didn't matter. It wasn't like he could go to the bathroom anyway, you know, get in a wheelchair and wheel over. It couldn't do any of that stuff.

I would definitely pass up, but I knew there was a chance I could die. And so I would start to have these conversations. Like, oh, calm yourself down. Calm yourself down, Jake. You gotta calm down. You gotta calm down.

I would definitely pass up, but I knew there was a chance I could die. And so I would start to have these conversations. Like, oh, calm yourself down. Calm yourself down, Jake. You gotta calm down. You gotta calm down.

Basically, I got a bird's eye view. Like, my vision left my body and went to the ceiling. And it was like my eyes turned around to look at me, but also could see the entire 360 of the room. And also, I had the ability to, like, zoom in on things. Kind of like a security camera. It was really weird. And I was like... I don't know, just like super rational. And I'm like, well, this can't be real.

Basically, I got a bird's eye view. Like, my vision left my body and went to the ceiling. And it was like my eyes turned around to look at me, but also could see the entire 360 of the room. And also, I had the ability to, like, zoom in on things. Kind of like a security camera. It was really weird. And I was like... I don't know, just like super rational. And I'm like, well, this can't be real.

Like, what the fuck is happening? And this happened for the first time when I had, and as we all know by now, my visitors were gone. fairly scarce. So when I would have a visitor or something important, this would happen or something I viewed as important. So the first one was with my mother-in-law, Cindy, and it was a really heavy conversation. She was crying.

Like, what the fuck is happening? And this happened for the first time when I had, and as we all know by now, my visitors were gone. fairly scarce. So when I would have a visitor or something important, this would happen or something I viewed as important. So the first one was with my mother-in-law, Cindy, and it was a really heavy conversation. She was crying.

She kind of came in, pulled the chair. She wasn't like close to the bed. You know, if I'm in bed, she was on the left. She had these black leggings. It's like, black shirt and black sweater. And she had this silver brooch she wore and her pearl necklaces. And I could really zoom in on what she was saying in her emotion and facial expressions. And it was like super, super intense.

She kind of came in, pulled the chair. She wasn't like close to the bed. You know, if I'm in bed, she was on the left. She had these black leggings. It's like, black shirt and black sweater. And she had this silver brooch she wore and her pearl necklaces. And I could really zoom in on what she was saying in her emotion and facial expressions. And it was like super, super intense.

And it was crazy, you know, because I could only look at the ceiling. So it's like, how is this? possible. I really thought it was a hallucination for a while. It wasn't until I'm communicating in 2019 with the Megabee, I was like, can I ask you something? She was like, of course, and I was like, did this happen? You came in in your ICU to say goodbye to me, and you were wearing this, and

And it was crazy, you know, because I could only look at the ceiling. So it's like, how is this? possible. I really thought it was a hallucination for a while. It wasn't until I'm communicating in 2019 with the Megabee, I was like, can I ask you something? She was like, of course, and I was like, did this happen? You came in in your ICU to say goodbye to me, and you were wearing this, and

You were talking about how... I'm so sorry this happened. And I know this wasn't the way you wanted your life to go. And certainly not your life with my daughter, Ellen. And I'm so sorry. And I want to let you know that she will be okay. I'll take care of her. So I regurgitate this, sir. I'm like, did this happen? And it was so emotional for me. I felt like I was crying with you.

You were talking about how... I'm so sorry this happened. And I know this wasn't the way you wanted your life to go. And certainly not your life with my daughter, Ellen. And I'm so sorry. And I want to let you know that she will be okay. I'll take care of her. So I regurgitate this, sir. I'm like, did this happen? And it was so emotional for me. I felt like I was crying with you.

And she was like, how could you possibly know that? Yes, I vividly remember that. And I could have sworn you actually shed a tear. Yeah, I wrote about it non-verbally right after that conversation. I was like, whoa, that is crazy because that really happened. That was the first confirmation from, you know, the only other person in the room.

And she was like, how could you possibly know that? Yes, I vividly remember that. And I could have sworn you actually shed a tear. Yeah, I wrote about it non-verbally right after that conversation. I was like, whoa, that is crazy because that really happened. That was the first confirmation from, you know, the only other person in the room.

This short little guy who wore the same bow tie and like, you know, no disrespect to bow ties. My uncle Adam wears bow tie. So I'm not shitting on bow ties. But this guy's bow tie was like kind of goofy. And with my sense of humor and sarcasm, even being trapped in my own body, I just kind of made fun of his bow tie. And I could see it from the ceiling.

This short little guy who wore the same bow tie and like, you know, no disrespect to bow ties. My uncle Adam wears bow tie. So I'm not shitting on bow ties. But this guy's bow tie was like kind of goofy. And with my sense of humor and sarcasm, even being trapped in my own body, I just kind of made fun of his bow tie. And I could see it from the ceiling.