Jake Haendel

It would make me tense my body up and my fingers were approaching close to my palms and my nails would start digging in and spasms and my contractures would hurt.

It would make me tense my body up and my fingers were approaching close to my palms and my nails would start digging in and spasms and my contractures would hurt.

My mother-in-law and wife really ran the conversation. And again, my wife at the time was an excellent advocate and she was getting all these ideas to ask Fana. And it was about an hour of them just like talking, me just kind of laying in a stretcher. She's like, do you have any questions for him? And I kind of like come closer because I can't talk loud. And I go, ask him if I'm going to die.

My mother-in-law and wife really ran the conversation. And again, my wife at the time was an excellent advocate and she was getting all these ideas to ask Fana. And it was about an hour of them just like talking, me just kind of laying in a stretcher. She's like, do you have any questions for him? And I kind of like come closer because I can't talk loud. And I go, ask him if I'm going to die.

She goes, he wants to know if you think he's going to die. And I'm looking at this man right in the eyes. I was studying his facial expressions to kind of like gauge if I thought he was telling me what I wanted to hear or not. He looked puzzled, a genuine puzzled look of like, why would this guy even ask me such a thing? And then like went to like, no, I don't think so.

She goes, he wants to know if you think he's going to die. And I'm looking at this man right in the eyes. I was studying his facial expressions to kind of like gauge if I thought he was telling me what I wanted to hear or not. He looked puzzled, a genuine puzzled look of like, why would this guy even ask me such a thing? And then like went to like, no, I don't think so.

The way he answered and knowing that he's like the world's expert, I was just like, oh, wow, maybe, maybe I'm not.

The way he answered and knowing that he's like the world's expert, I was just like, oh, wow, maybe, maybe I'm not.

I can still, like, say three-word sentences.

I can still, like, say three-word sentences.

No, but I remember to said to my wife, I said, oh, I love you.

No, but I remember to said to my wife, I said, oh, I love you.

Autonomous storming, it's like trying to drive a car without gas. For me, I couldn't regulate body temperature anymore. I'd spike fevers of 106 and then I'd go down to hypothermia of like 95. So I'd be in that range back and forth. I would have tachycardia and triple tachycardia. I would spike over 200 beats per minute. I was diaphoretic, which means I'd be dripping sweat.

Autonomous storming, it's like trying to drive a car without gas. For me, I couldn't regulate body temperature anymore. I'd spike fevers of 106 and then I'd go down to hypothermia of like 95. So I'd be in that range back and forth. I would have tachycardia and triple tachycardia. I would spike over 200 beats per minute. I was diaphoretic, which means I'd be dripping sweat.

I felt like I was running a marathon, but I was paralyzed in bed. I'd have posturing, severe spasms. I would at times look like I was possessed. Like I had an exorcism in my back.

I felt like I was running a marathon, but I was paralyzed in bed. I'd have posturing, severe spasms. I would at times look like I was possessed. Like I had an exorcism in my back.

Yeah. There was a demon inside me for sure. A constellation of symptoms would happen. And these storms can last anywhere from four hours. Mine would last 16. They would stop when I would pass out. And I would think I would die. I wasn't sure. Every time. Because storms, autonomic storms, are actually universally fatal. And I stormed for a year.

Yeah. There was a demon inside me for sure. A constellation of symptoms would happen. And these storms can last anywhere from four hours. Mine would last 16. They would stop when I would pass out. And I would think I would die. I wasn't sure. Every time. Because storms, autonomic storms, are actually universally fatal. And I stormed for a year.

I survived, but I would pass out from my heart beating so fast. Then I'd wake up in a new hospital room, sometimes transferred to the ER, an ice bath, Spalding, back to MGH. Every time they transferred me, it would set me into a storm.

I survived, but I would pass out from my heart beating so fast. Then I'd wake up in a new hospital room, sometimes transferred to the ER, an ice bath, Spalding, back to MGH. Every time they transferred me, it would set me into a storm.