Jake Humphrey

weird period in the early 2000s when I had these mad intrusive thoughts.

Is this like when you walk past an oven and you imagine putting your kid in the oven?

So I just basically thought that horrendous things were going to happen and that I was going to do the horrendous thing.

Yeah, exactly.

Or when you're driving a car and you think, what if I just steered into the central reservation?

Now imagine living with that all the time.

You have that?

I did.

24-7 and everything you see, you think, what if I just did this?

What if I just did that?

But then you think it's real.

And it feels so real that you can't imagine it isn't real.

So, and this is a long time ago where there was nothing like better help and conversations like this were not happening.

So I did not know what to do.

So for two years, I would lay in bed like sweating and my wife, girlfriend at the time, would be like, why are you soaking wet?

What's going on?

I'd be like, I don't know, I'm just a bit hot tonight, can't sleep.

And I didn't want to go, well, for the last two years, I thought I'm going to do something absolutely insanely crazy.

And I couldn't talk to anyone at work about it because it's like you can't be a kids' TV presenter and mental.

Those two things don't marry up.