Jefferson Fisher

You're setting the roadmap of what you see.

So get really good at using language that kind of forecasts the direction and movement of where you're wanting to take them.

So instead of this, hey, I need to have a conversation with you.

I'm not happy about what you're doing.

This isn't going well or whatever it is.

have conversations around, I like to move us in a direction where you and I can do this more efficiently, and I need your help with this, right?

You're telling them you still need their help in the same way they need your help.

And so to have that open line of communication of that, hey, we're going in this direction together,

That is you calling the shots.

That's you being captain of the ship, so to speak, to allow them to trust that you're also gonna take care of them and bring them on board with you.

You with me?

All right, number three, let's say,

You need to have a really hard conversation with this person and they're friends and you like them.

And there's this guy who's also another engineer and he's your boy, but this time he's causing you some problems, right?

You're not really sure how to handle it and you wanna sound more direct.

I'm going to encourage you

to use what I deep dive in the book as frames, conversational frames, meaning you are pinpointing exactly the issue that needs to be spoken of, and you are naming the goal of the conversation before you even begin.

because it's often that we get it backwards.

So this is what a frame could sound like for you with this person that might be giving you some issues.

So you're going to start with number one, telling them what you need to talk to them about.