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Jennifer Selby Long

๐Ÿ‘ค Speaker
1396 total appearances

Appearances Over Time

Podcast Appearances

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

Yeah, absolutely. It's one of the reasons that I think it is so important for leaders to not just somehow think we aligned on our goals and now we just march forward because goals are pretty dynamic, right? And the different pressures that businesses are under change as markets change, as the geopolitical environment changes, you need to stay well-seeked up and well-aligned as a leadership team.

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

Yeah, absolutely. It's one of the reasons that I think it is so important for leaders to not just somehow think we aligned on our goals and now we just march forward because goals are pretty dynamic, right? And the different pressures that businesses are under change as markets change, as the geopolitical environment changes, you need to stay well-seeked up and well-aligned as a leadership team.

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

or you're going to be giving differing direction to the people who work for you. And then those people will find themselves at loggerheads and starting to do some infighting with one another, in part because you did not stay aligned at that higher level. And really, also, I would say of great significance, didn't learn how to raise and address conflict in a way that was healthy and effective.

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

or you're going to be giving differing direction to the people who work for you. And then those people will find themselves at loggerheads and starting to do some infighting with one another, in part because you did not stay aligned at that higher level. And really, also, I would say of great significance, didn't learn how to raise and address conflict in a way that was healthy and effective.

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

Yeah, we could probably eliminate a good chunk of politics by just improving the ability to raise and resolve conflict in a healthy way.

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

Yeah, we could probably eliminate a good chunk of politics by just improving the ability to raise and resolve conflict in a healthy way.

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

Sure. I think that often when people get together to have conversations about business or whatever it is that they're accountable for within a business, they talk about the goal that's passed, the things that seem very concrete and hard and in a plan. And then when one person believes that one thing is true and our other believes the other is true, they just start talking at each other.

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

Sure. I think that often when people get together to have conversations about business or whatever it is that they're accountable for within a business, they talk about the goal that's passed, the things that seem very concrete and hard and in a plan. And then when one person believes that one thing is true and our other believes the other is true, they just start talking at each other.

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

Instead of stepping back to say, wait a minute, it seemed like We're in conflict here. How many times have people done that in the business environment? Pretty rare to step back and say, it seems that we're in conflict with each other. Let's step back. Let's put ourselves in one another's shoes. Let's ask some more questions. Let's make sure we understand the situation.

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

Instead of stepping back to say, wait a minute, it seemed like We're in conflict here. How many times have people done that in the business environment? Pretty rare to step back and say, it seems that we're in conflict with each other. Let's step back. Let's put ourselves in one another's shoes. Let's ask some more questions. Let's make sure we understand the situation.

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

And I've had a number of early clients say, oh, I don't have time to do that. How much time are you wasting now on the political battles because you didn't step back and try to put yourself in the shoes of all of these other people and understand where they're coming from?

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

And I've had a number of early clients say, oh, I don't have time to do that. How much time are you wasting now on the political battles because you didn't step back and try to put yourself in the shoes of all of these other people and understand where they're coming from?

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

Check to make sure you actually understand where they're coming from and what's driving them because you're probably making some false assumptions about what that is. I can just about guarantee it. Are you stepping back to list the areas where you're in agreement? Probably not. Most people don't. As you start to work through these things, differing dialing is another one. Oh, my gosh.

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

Check to make sure you actually understand where they're coming from and what's driving them because you're probably making some false assumptions about what that is. I can just about guarantee it. Are you stepping back to list the areas where you're in agreement? Probably not. Most people don't. As you start to work through these things, differing dialing is another one. Oh, my gosh.

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

I've had teams that were leadership teams. See, you said we're just starting to backbite one another and get into a little bit of gamesmanship. And when we analyze the different styles on the team and we were able to step back objectively and look at that and say, can you come to some agreements here? on your behaviors because you all have naturally different styles.

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

I've had teams that were leadership teams. See, you said we're just starting to backbite one another and get into a little bit of gamesmanship. And when we analyze the different styles on the team and we were able to step back objectively and look at that and say, can you come to some agreements here? on your behaviors because you all have naturally different styles.

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

You're all coming in with naturally different assumptions about what it means to be on a team, what it means to communicate, what it means to commit. You all have different assumptions about what that looks like. And so stepping back to look at the style and do you have conflict that is really exacerbated by these different styles and the fact that you haven't talked about it out loud?

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

You're all coming in with naturally different assumptions about what it means to be on a team, what it means to communicate, what it means to commit. You all have different assumptions about what that looks like. And so stepping back to look at the style and do you have conflict that is really exacerbated by these different styles and the fact that you haven't talked about it out loud?

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

You've just frustrated one another. So start to work your way through this checklist of things. Eventually, what you come down to is the substance of what you don't agree on. And from there, then you can start to work through what that is. But it's often quite small compared to what it looks like because people are not taking the time to raise and deal with conflict.

Chief Change Officer
#80 Jennifer Selby Long on Growing Beyond Office Politics: Breaking Free from Toxic Cultures That Follow You - Part Two

You've just frustrated one another. So start to work your way through this checklist of things. Eventually, what you come down to is the substance of what you don't agree on. And from there, then you can start to work through what that is. But it's often quite small compared to what it looks like because people are not taking the time to raise and deal with conflict.