Jessica Wynn

So they went back to the drawing board and then just started aggressively marketing it to women as hygiene.

In 1910, they even introduced a breast douche for, quote, thorough breast washing.

I know.

It's like shame has always been a business model.

Oh, yeah, just place this stone in there and watch the magic happen.

I'm not exactly sure what kind of psychosomatic stuff is supposed to be happening.

It's all pseudoscience nonsense.

Wellness does not mean science.

A couple months ago, Kourtney Kardashian's company, Lemmy, launched Pussy Pops.

lollipops for your vagina that are quote formulated with pineapple and vitamin c so i don't know about other women but my vagina is the last place i'd like to put citrus and my favorite part about the pussy pops is that her ad campaign shows her with a lollipop in her mouth which i

Makes me wonder what she thinks a vagina is.

So I don't know when people started thinking they should or could alter their body's pH balance, but you can't.

And if you do, you could die.

Way to get around the marketing restrictions on labels and things like, OK, we'll try this till they outlaw it.

And what actually maintains vaginal health is balanced flora, hydration, diet, and just overall health.

If your genitals require a goop subscription, maybe capitalism's the real infection.

Well, studies show there are more bacteria in your mouth than in your vagina.

So relax and just don't believe the marketing hype.

Not even a little bit.

Go ahead and douche your penis hole and get back to me, whatever.