Jillian Turecki

Well, there's different reasons. So some people will start to sabotage because the relationship is progressing to a more emotionally intimate stage and they're scared. They're just very scared to get close to someone. They're afraid that they're not going to be enough. They're afraid they're going to be left.

Well, there's different reasons. So some people will start to sabotage because the relationship is progressing to a more emotionally intimate stage and they're scared. They're just very scared to get close to someone. They're afraid that they're not going to be enough. They're afraid they're going to be left.

They're afraid they're going to, maybe they have very low self-worth and they think this person is going to see me for who I am and they're not going to like it and they're going to leave me. Everyone fears the loss of love. And so the sabotage is, let me end this, or let me provoke them to end it so that I don't have to look like the bad guy, or I don't have to get my feelings hurt.

They're afraid they're going to, maybe they have very low self-worth and they think this person is going to see me for who I am and they're not going to like it and they're going to leave me. Everyone fears the loss of love. And so the sabotage is, let me end this, or let me provoke them to end it so that I don't have to look like the bad guy, or I don't have to get my feelings hurt.

A lot of women... will test particularly their male partners. They do this same sex relationships too. But particularly their male partners, they'll test to see, do you really love me?

A lot of women... will test particularly their male partners. They do this same sex relationships too. But particularly their male partners, they'll test to see, do you really love me?

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think it's different.

I think it's different.

No, I think so for women, it's are you safe? It's really what most women are really looking for, particularly. Are you safe? So in other words, like, are you just going to drop me when you see that I'm not perfect? Because there's a lot of.

No, I think so for women, it's are you safe? It's really what most women are really looking for, particularly. Are you safe? So in other words, like, are you just going to drop me when you see that I'm not perfect? Because there's a lot of.

cultural, particularly in this country, it's not in all countries, there's a lot of societal pressure on women to be perfect, to look perfect, to act perfect, to not rock the boat. And so if you see that actually, like, if you see my crazy, if you see that I'm flawed, And this is unconscious. Women aren't doing this consciously.

cultural, particularly in this country, it's not in all countries, there's a lot of societal pressure on women to be perfect, to look perfect, to act perfect, to not rock the boat. And so if you see that actually, like, if you see my crazy, if you see that I'm flawed, And this is unconscious. Women aren't doing this consciously.

I'm trying to help them to see that it's conscious and to not do that because it's not polite. We shouldn't be doing it, right? It's just not healthy. But we do that because on an unconscious level, because we want to see like, are you still going to love me? Are you still going to protect me when I'm not perfect?

I'm trying to help them to see that it's conscious and to not do that because it's not polite. We shouldn't be doing it, right? It's just not healthy. But we do that because on an unconscious level, because we want to see like, are you still going to love me? Are you still going to protect me when I'm not perfect?

Well, men don't have the pressure that women do to be perfect.

Well, men don't have the pressure that women do to be perfect.

Perfect in different ways.

Perfect in different ways.