Jim Jordan

Do you want to raise barbarians who aren't welcome wherever they go? We had children come over to our house at one point. Their parents were completely, they were very permissive. And we're tyrants because of it. These kids were quite young. They had to follow the kids around every second in our household because they couldn't be trusted not to destroy something.

My kids at that point, they knew what they could play with and what they couldn't. And so I could just leave them be. They had maximal freedom because they mastered a few simple rules. When we sat down to dinner, the children immediately ate all the centers out of the bread bowl. It's like, well, we didn't invite them back. And now you've got to think about what that means.

My kids at that point, they knew what they could play with and what they couldn't. And so I could just leave them be. They had maximal freedom because they mastered a few simple rules. When we sat down to dinner, the children immediately ate all the centers out of the bread bowl. It's like, well, we didn't invite them back. And now you've got to think about what that means.

It means that their poor disciplinary interventions, which were based on either lack of skill or lack of courage, made their children socially undesirable, right? That's a terrible thing to allow to have happen because look, most people, terrible consequences, because that means that when the children go out, they face disapproval and frowns that are often hidden behind a mask.

It means that their poor disciplinary interventions, which were based on either lack of skill or lack of courage, made their children socially undesirable, right? That's a terrible thing to allow to have happen because look, most people, terrible consequences, because that means that when the children go out, they face disapproval and frowns that are often hidden behind a mask.

And so that's their world. vaguely disapproving people who don't want them around for reasons they don't exactly understand. Jesus, that's awful. That's awful. And so you're a proxy for the world as a parent. And so you want to be stringent about what you encourage your children to manifest and what you bring under control. And you can.

And so that's their world. vaguely disapproving people who don't want them around for reasons they don't exactly understand. Jesus, that's awful. That's awful. And so you're a proxy for the world as a parent. And so you want to be stringent about what you encourage your children to manifest and what you bring under control. And you can.

If you're aware of that, you know that's your responsibility. You can do that.

If you're aware of that, you know that's your responsibility. You can do that.

Well, I hope they, first of all, see that the problems that they're having are shared by many people. and that they're real, and that there are solutions, and that the series describes some of the actual solutions, but it also describes the process by which solutions to many problems can be generated, which is even more useful. How do you identify a problem in the household?

Well, I hope they, first of all, see that the problems that they're having are shared by many people. and that they're real, and that there are solutions, and that the series describes some of the actual solutions, but it also describes the process by which solutions to many problems can be generated, which is even more useful. How do you identify a problem in the household?

Well, something that's disruptive occurs with regularity. Here's another take. People often focus their attention on the exceptional happenings in their life, Christmas or vacation, some special occasion. But your life is what repeats. So I've had clients, for example, who had a war with their child for 25 minutes every night when they put them to bed for like five years.

Well, something that's disruptive occurs with regularity. Here's another take. People often focus their attention on the exceptional happenings in their life, Christmas or vacation, some special occasion. But your life is what repeats. So I've had clients, for example, who had a war with their child for 25 minutes every night when they put them to bed for like five years.

That's their whole relationship. So it repeats every day. You want to get everything that repeats every day right. Right. Smooth functioning. Right. Because that's your life. You know, one of the things you can do with your wife, for example, is negotiate how you greet each other when you come home. Because you come home.

That's their whole relationship. So it repeats every day. You want to get everything that repeats every day right. Right. Smooth functioning. Right. Because that's your life. You know, one of the things you can do with your wife, for example, is negotiate how you greet each other when you come home. Because you come home.

likely every day or even several times every day you know and if you're if the situation is that we'll do a stereotype here the mother's at home taking care of the kids the father comes home and the second he steps in he's met with a litany of complaints and an insane boatload of responsibility that's a pathway to associating home with resentment forever right Figure it out.

likely every day or even several times every day you know and if you're if the situation is that we'll do a stereotype here the mother's at home taking care of the kids the father comes home and the second he steps in he's met with a litany of complaints and an insane boatload of responsibility that's a pathway to associating home with resentment forever right Figure it out.

It's like, how do you make the transition? Because you do it every day. You know, you can do the math. Maybe you come home, there's the transition to come home. Let's call that 20 minutes a day. So that's 105, let's say 120 minutes a week. That's two hours a week. That's eight hours a month. So that's a work day a year. That's 12 work days a year. That's the amount of time you're spending.

It's like, how do you make the transition? Because you do it every day. You know, you can do the math. Maybe you come home, there's the transition to come home. Let's call that 20 minutes a day. So that's 105, let's say 120 minutes a week. That's two hours a week. That's eight hours a month. So that's a work day a year. That's 12 work days a year. That's the amount of time you're spending.

Half a month of days coming home, right? Okay, so half a month, you get 24 of those things, right? 24, that's all. Your life is in order. Wow. Yeah, yeah. Arithmetic, man, it's very useful.