John Delony

do all the counseling and that person could hurt you again.

And what I will tell you is I think the risk is worth it because a good or great connection with somebody or good or great marriage has such outsized benefits on your life that I think the risk is worth it.

But for you, that risk is going to come very slowly again.

We're going to go slow this time to take that risk again.

And we're just going to be wise, go slow, be honest, honest, honest.

And it is making some choices for the next 60 days, next 90 days, next 120 days.

When these stories pop up, when my rage pops up, I'm literally going to pick up a brick and set it down and say, I'm not carrying this today.

I forgive you.

I'm not carrying you.

I'm not giving you space inside my chest any longer.

And that won't magically make all of your anger evaporate.

It won't magically make everything go away.

But it is a conscious reminder to your body, I'm driving my own car now.

You don't have to take over with your automatic stories, your automatic replays, your automatic setting off the alarm systems.

I'm driving and I'm hurt right now.

So I'm going to go slow.

And your body will go, okay, cool.

You're driving.

Sweet.

But it's a slow practice.