John Delony

And then you say, here's what, how I want our house to feel when I get home.

And y'all build that world.

And you both know we've never built this like this before.

And so it's going to be clumsy and we're going to give each other grace.

And if best we can, we'll laugh.

And for me and my wife, we still to this day, we have weekly check-ins.

How are we?

How can I love you today?

We set a goal this year.

And how did you see me holding up my end of the bargain?

What's your reflection with me?

Have you asked him?

He would tell me no.

Okay, but there's one more question beneath that.

When you're a caretaker, when you're a people pleaser...

It is your job, and you probably learned this as a little girl, I have to anticipate the emotional stability of the people around me before they do so that we can all stay safe.

And you have a radar that is going off all the time, right?

What you have to practice is setting, turn the radar off and looking at him and saying this scary question, how can I love you today?

And when your whole identity has been, I will know how to love you.

And by the way, Hollywood has told you if your marriage is worth a crap, you'll already know what he needs and what he wants, which is nonsense.