Jon Stewart

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The headlines will still be there in the morning.

You might as well wake up ready for them.

You're listening to Comedy Central.

One of the big mysteries of the Trump era is how so many Republicans can see everything Trump is doing and not say anything.

The blatant corruption, disregarding the Constitution, that MAGA masturbation dance.

Mr. President, I don't know who you've been jerking off this whole time, but if they haven't come by now, they never will, okay?

Look, the whole point of a democracy is that the president is not an all-powerful figure who's always right and can never be questioned.

That sounds more like a little kid's idea of their father.

And I think that's the answer.

Republicans aren't looking for a president.

They're looking for a daddy.

Yeah, and that's not me just saying it.