Jordan Harbinger

And so he unconsciously looks for a new one and the new one is boredom.

I'm just thinking about the implications of that for relationships because we usually talk about the honeymoon period with people, right?

And now I'm thinking like, is the excitement and mania of new love, is that also a defense?

But there's also fantasy in our friend here's story as well.

He's talking about his career and his hobbies, not people, but there's still this daydreaming thing.

And maybe that's also preventing him from being in a real relationship with the reality of his goals because he's indulging a story in his mind.

But I also get this, right?

I've done the same thing.

When I was a new lawyer, I was low-key fantasizing about being some baller partner who works three hours a day and owns four vacation homes or whatever.

But before I realized, I hated the law.

Or more recently, a couple years ago, when I started working out really seriously, now it's been like five years, but I barely started managing my diet and I was already like, I'm gonna have a six pack.

You know, I think we all do that to some degree.

And maybe that's even useful on some level because it is exciting and it is motivating.

But if he's living primarily in the fantasy that he has the corner office and five million in the bank while he neglects his call sheet and his sales numbers plummet and he realizes he actually hates talking to customers.

Exactly.

So it's not that fantasizing is inherently pathological.

Right.

But how do you fantasize?

What do you do with your fantasies?

That is the difference.