Julian Barnes

It was like being taken downhill in an avalanche and every day something got worse.

And it was the most...

Well, it's by a long way the most appalling thing that has happened to me in my life.

And the most, the blackest, the thing that most deprived you of sort of hope and balance, really.

It took me years to get over it.

But I don't think I shall mourn my own departure in quite the same way.

No, she didn't give any specific guidance.

She was herself as much as possible right to the very end.

I mean, her last complete sentence was she was brought home from the hospital on a stretcher and she was put in a bed in the sitting room.

And the guys who brought her in sort of rather dumped her on the bed.

And I said, was that a bugger?

And she said, a bit of a bugger.

which was wonderfully precise, you know, don't complain, just say exactly what the situation is.

And that was her last sentence.

And she died about 48 hours later.

I suppose you could say that she showed me how to die with grace and grace.

And also with a consideration for other people who are coming to see her.

She never got cross.

She never became tragic or upset.

So in some ways, we were well suited because I have that sort of temperament as well.