Julian Barnes

No, I never thought that.

I've never had any religious belief.

I think that life is all we have and there's nothing after it.

It's very hard to believe in a calm and loving God when you look at the state of the world.

I remember Stephen Fry, the actor, was on a chat show in Ireland where religion was in

healthier shape than it was in England at the time.

And the interviewer said, so give me one reason why you don't believe in God.

And Stephen Fry answered, child cancer.

which is sort of kind of unanswerable I think.

If he's a loving God, then why does the just do badly?

Why do the unjust succeed?

Why do innocent people get suddenly killed?

It makes no sense except that the defense from the religious

is God moves in mysterious ways we simply don't know.

We'll find out later.

That's sort of not good enough for me.

I remember very clearly when I thought that I might kill myself.

It was a few weeks after my wife had died and I was walking home and

I looked across at the curb on the other side of the road.

And at that moment, I still see that curb stone on a daily basis.