Karen Kilgariff

speaker

3,962 appearances 39 recordings 3 series first heard Nov 2024 last heard 8 Jun

Karen Kilgariff’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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recordings per month · last 12 months

Recordings per month over the last 12 months — 1 in all, peaking in Jun 2026 with 1.

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My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark · MFM Minisode 419 · 20 Jan 2025 podcast

Good for you. I would have been like, I'm pretending that didn't happen. And like...

The cats will alert you.

Maybe they had one of those like runners post-run foil jackets. Yeah. Or like blankets.

I don't think you'd need one for a 5K or maybe not even a 10K.

I know. It's weird.

Look at us. There's still time to go back. I'm like, no, there fucking isn't.

She went to pick her up at school and came home without her. Where is the, like, there's no. How do you miss that?

Oh, it's not fair. It's not fair. That's hilarious.

Oh, you see fucking everything when I'm trying to be sneaky and then I'm trying to do a show. I'm not going to tell you the title of this one, but you'll probably get it. Okay. Hi, everyone. That it just goes into. Somewhere in the Midwest during the 80s, my younger sister and I were dragged to my grandpa's house so the family could go out back and play cards.

Like, what would you give to fucking be there right now? Right? In the 60s, you said? 80s, even. In the Midwest, playing cards in the backyard.

And speaking of Miller High Life, there's just like bottles popping, right?

When we first arrived, everyone ate dinner and then the kids were promptly shoved into the spare room to, quote, play. This bedroom was circa 1960 with shag carpet, rock hard bed. My grandma had this fucking room. Everything smelled musty and it had a small TV with a VCR in the bottom to play Lassie for the hundredth time. Like, I am there. Yeah. You know? It was kid prison, which is one word.

I'm about seven and the oldest between all the kids. There are five of us bored out of our minds. So naturally we need to do something about that. Earlier during dinner, I remembered seeing this massive jar in the fridge filled with red stuff. And before being shoved into kid prison, I got a sneak peek. Now to the master plan.

I convinced my cousin to go with me to get the jar because it's a two-man job. Plus, I had another cousin being lookout. We were sophisticated criminals then. We managed to slowly carry this massive jar of cherries to the kid prison where we all stood around and admired its glory. There's nothing better in life when you're a child than maraschino cherries.

can i get a chili temple and it's like you're 18 years old but it's that vibe it's that it is magical it'll never not be magical no i was seven and i still remember the waiter at the restaurant overhearing me say i did a million marcian cherries if i could and he brought me a fucking like shot glass full of them i still it was like one of the best days of my life that's called customer service right there that's fucking right i'm sure my dad tipped like shit okay

Okay. Glory. We finally cracked it open. All grabbed a cherry and popped it in her mouth at the same time. Almost as quick. We instantly spit it out. Ew, gross. These cherries don't taste right. And then we decided we don't care. And we went full in. I had a pink arm up to my bicep from grabbing cherries. We were in heaven.

And then, so the title of this one's called Drunk Kids because it says, fast forward to drunk parents finding drunk kids passed out everywhere with a cherryless jar. Everyone was freaking out. Kids were stumbling. My little sister puking. It's hilarious to hear the stories because I only remember the first part of that night.

To this day, my aunts and uncles can't agree what the cherries were soaking in. Moonshine. Some say gin, others say moonshine.

Stay sexy and don't put your boozy fruit on the bottom shelf. Suze.

Oh, to go back. And you've been searching for it ever since. And you'll never find it. You'll never find it.

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