Katherine Woodward Thomas

They don't internalize it.

They don't have the cognitive, or we didn't have the cognitive capacity to recognize the situation with any kind of complexity or holistic understanding that, oh, my mother needs AA, or my parents are having money problems.

It became who I am, that somehow I am inadequate here.

I cannot help this situation.

I cannot do anything in this situation.

I am too small.

I am too insignificant.

But there are also, so these are what I call relational woundings.

The I'm not good enough is in relationship to someone.

Your interpretation of what they must feel about you.

All beliefs have three components to them.

We're a little unsophisticated.

We'll say, okay, I think I'm not enough.

But what that means really is that when I'm with others, what I'm projecting onto others is that others are better than me.

or that others don't value me.

And then also, there's a projection onto life that somehow I'm insignificant, that no matter what I do, I cannot get ahead.

I have to do twice as much for half the reward.

So there's a whole worldview that's centered on who I am, what is or is not possible for me, how other people are going to treat me, or how other people will feel about me.

The thing about the I'm not good enough, and that is the most pervasive one, although the second runner-up is I'm alone, particularly in America, where we kind of live with rugged individualism, and we're all so separate, and we're on our little devices, which is only increasing that.

But there are actually, you know, 22 of them, which I've determined are the most common ones.