Kati Morton

I need to be needed.

And if no one needs anything from me, I don't know how to relax.

Or if I can't be of use to someone, whether it's work, whether it's school, whether it's friendships, whether it's kids, you know, family, if nobody is needing of me, I don't know who I am.

Does that make sense?

It's like it's a deeper thing.

It's like instead of it being just I'm being a good person and I want to show up for people because I believe we all should do that.

And that's what that builds healthy relationships, having people you can count on.

However, when that comes at the cost of our own health, of our own well-being time and time again, that's when it's a problem.

Yeah, then it gets in the way of you being able to do anything else that you want to do, right?

Or ways to take care of yourself.

We all have things we love to do, hobbies that we want to spend time in, like I love to read.

And so if I'm always doing for other people, then I'm not going to have any quiet time for myself to do that.

And we have to make sure that it's a balance between filling our own cup and filling other people's.

I kind of love that analogy in general, like you can't pour from an empty cup because it's so like visual.

you legitimately can't.

You know, if there's no water or beverage to be poured, you can't pour.

And so I think if we're not pouring into ourselves first and only pouring out, that's, you know, that's when it's an unhealthy behavior versus just me being a good human to people in my life.

100%.

I think a lot of times, you know, it depends on, again, how we're raised and how we think about our relationships.

But for almost everybody out there, there have been times when we've been in a relationship where someone is a taker, and we're a giver, and we overgive, you know, we do light ourselves on fire to keep them warm.