Kendra Dahlstrom

So just a heads up is that, you know, I had realized that I'd lived a very codependent life where like with a codependent parent.

And so everything was always about somebody else and taking care of others.

And in order to stay away from acknowledging my pain and trauma, I was just always focused on everyone else.

And so that was, it took me years to kind of really get to the bottom of it.

But

I think it depends on the person, but I think a great place to start with someone who's very cerebral, Ryan, is let's start with what you don't want.

You know, let's get real clear on like, what are the non-negotiables that you don't want?

And then, and then let's go back to the non-negotiables, the things that are important to you, because if you can, because you're never going to get them away from their values, right?

If their values are family and faith and, um, community, then that's a great place to start.

And so, um,

Sometimes I'll have a values conversation with them.

And then I often tell them to visualize the values like a tree and kind of play with putting each one as the trunk of the tree and the roots of the tree.

And so what you'll find over time is most people, even though family and community and prosperity or wealth or a career, things are on their list, there's always something that's the roots of the tree.

And so for me, it's spiritual connectedness.

For me, it's

I want to feel that everything is being done through the purity of a spiritual connection.

And that doesn't mean my family is not important, but if I do it through that lens, it's so much more rich for me.

And so that's kind of an exercise I'll do to help people visually kind of see like, okay, I can have all these values, but there's really one that's a core driver that without it, the other things don't light me up as much.

Does that make sense?

Yeah.