Kerry

Yes, I am.

Yes, I am.

Good, how are you?

Good, how are you?

Okay, I guess I'll start. So our overall question is just, kind of like needing advice on how do we figure out when to have kids or if we should wait given our medical school and residency timeline.

Okay, I guess I'll start. So our overall question is just, kind of like needing advice on how do we figure out when to have kids or if we should wait given our medical school and residency timeline.

Um, I guess for background, I'm a second year medical student and, um, he is applying to medical school right now. Um, and so it just, it's kind of complicated.

Um, I guess for background, I'm a second year medical student and, um, he is applying to medical school right now. Um, and so it just, it's kind of complicated.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, correct.

Yeah, correct.

I would...

I would...

I want to live a non-anxious life and I just don't want to keep this secret anymore. And my original plan was to like get on top of things and then everything would be fine. But now I just, I want to be, I want to be a good wife. I want to be open and honest. And I just, I need his help with the finances and, um, we've got to start from ground zero, I think.

I want to live a non-anxious life and I just don't want to keep this secret anymore. And my original plan was to like get on top of things and then everything would be fine. But now I just, I want to be, I want to be a good wife. I want to be open and honest. And I just, I need his help with the finances and, um, we've got to start from ground zero, I think.

Sort of.

Sort of.

So a big part of the whole question is just... We're Christian and we're trying to balance our values of, you know, wanting to have a family. And that is, to me, definitely the most important thing in my life other than the Lord. And it just makes it complicated to do both.

So a big part of the whole question is just... We're Christian and we're trying to balance our values of, you know, wanting to have a family. And that is, to me, definitely the most important thing in my life other than the Lord. And it just makes it complicated to do both.

It's, I think it like, it's more of like, like our faith is, it just, um, is very important. Not that it's like necessarily the most important. Um, but to me it feels more important than my job.

It's, I think it like, it's more of like, like our faith is, it just, um, is very important. Not that it's like necessarily the most important. Um, but to me it feels more important than my job.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I don't, I don't know. Okay. Um, it makes it hard with school for sure. Um, it's, I mean, my husband would definitely say that I struggle with like finding ways to like keep going with school because it's just like, I'm kind of having a hard time balancing it.

I don't, I don't know. Okay. Um, it makes it hard with school for sure. Um, it's, I mean, my husband would definitely say that I struggle with like finding ways to like keep going with school because it's just like, I'm kind of having a hard time balancing it.

Um, I want to have like four to six kids eventually. Okay. And I want to be a good mom, um, and a good wife. Um, And yeah, I mean, I want a job eventually, but I just, I don't, and like part of me likes the idea of like being able to help people and the, um, have like a, I don't know, like mentally stimulating job, which not that that is the only one out there. Um, but, um, yeah. Yeah.

Um, I want to have like four to six kids eventually. Okay. And I want to be a good mom, um, and a good wife. Um, And yeah, I mean, I want a job eventually, but I just, I don't, and like part of me likes the idea of like being able to help people and the, um, have like a, I don't know, like mentally stimulating job, which not that that is the only one out there. Um, but, um, yeah. Yeah.

A significant number of people.

A significant number of people.

My family, mainly.

My family, mainly.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Siblings, maybe.

Siblings, maybe.

I guess not.

I guess not.

I'm 24. Okay.

I'm 24. Okay.

Four months yesterday.

Four months yesterday.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, I guess I'm afraid that eventually I couldn't go back, or I wouldn't because it would be too much money, or X, Y, Z, and I would regret it somehow.

Yeah, I guess I'm afraid that eventually I couldn't go back, or I wouldn't because it would be too much money, or X, Y, Z, and I would regret it somehow.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, I like those sometimes.

Yeah, I like those sometimes.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I guess I would say I'm a stay-at-home mom. And so I kind of take care of all of the household duties and everything. you know, taking care of our kids and kind of everything that I can so that he can just work. And then, I mean, of course he helps with the kids and he helps with the household too. But I think he wants to be helpful with that too.

I guess I would say I'm a stay-at-home mom. And so I kind of take care of all of the household duties and everything. you know, taking care of our kids and kind of everything that I can so that he can just work. And then, I mean, of course he helps with the kids and he helps with the household too. But I think he wants to be helpful with that too.

And we've talked about it over the years, but it just like, we talk about it and then like nothing ever happens. And so I'm just kind of like left holding the bag.

And we've talked about it over the years, but it just like, we talk about it and then like nothing ever happens. And so I'm just kind of like left holding the bag.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, it could be both.

Oh, it could be both.

I'd say sort of me because he is so gung-ho about me being home and raising our kids. But I think that there's still a part of me that just wants to prove that I can do this, I can handle this, and be the CEO of my home and show them that I can do this, I guess.

I'd say sort of me because he is so gung-ho about me being home and raising our kids. But I think that there's still a part of me that just wants to prove that I can do this, I can handle this, and be the CEO of my home and show them that I can do this, I guess.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's the big part.

Yeah, that's the big part.

I had just worked administrative in some doctor's offices. Yeah.

I had just worked administrative in some doctor's offices. Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

Okay.

Yes.

Yes.

No, I love it. I feel more fulfilled than I ever have in my entire life.

No, I love it. I feel more fulfilled than I ever have in my entire life.

So it started last year. Last year and around the summer is when we decided that it's possible for me to be a stay-at-home mom. I had my first child earlier in the year last year. Um, and so I didn't really realize or know how to manage our money at that point.

So it started last year. Last year and around the summer is when we decided that it's possible for me to be a stay-at-home mom. I had my first child earlier in the year last year. Um, and so I didn't really realize or know how to manage our money at that point.

Um, as like we, as we went through the rest of 2023 and we had gotten to a point where we were down to zero and zero, like you didn't owe anybody any money. Say it again.

Um, as like we, as we went through the rest of 2023 and we had gotten to a point where we were down to zero and zero, like you didn't owe anybody any money. Say it again.

Like our bank account was zero.

Like our bank account was zero.

Yeah, and it kind of blew up, and I was like, okay, well, I can fix this. I can get on top of it. And I have a hard time, on a side note, I have a hard time saying no to him because he doesn't know what we don't have, and he wants to get this or do this, and so I don't want to be the officer of being like, no, we can't do that.

Yeah, and it kind of blew up, and I was like, okay, well, I can fix this. I can get on top of it. And I have a hard time, on a side note, I have a hard time saying no to him because he doesn't know what we don't have, and he wants to get this or do this, and so I don't want to be the officer of being like, no, we can't do that.

i am needing and wanting to be truthful and honest with my husband about some credit cards that he doesn't know about as well as how much money we actually have in our bank account versus what i have told him that we've had in our bank account uh-oh how bad is it

i am needing and wanting to be truthful and honest with my husband about some credit cards that he doesn't know about as well as how much money we actually have in our bank account versus what i have told him that we've had in our bank account uh-oh how bad is it

I guess I can't balance that well.

I guess I can't balance that well.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Exactly.

Exactly.

Yeah. How's this going to go? I don't fully know. I think ultimately it will work itself out, but I think that he's going to be very surprised and very upset at me and the situation.

Yeah. How's this going to go? I don't fully know. I think ultimately it will work itself out, but I think that he's going to be very surprised and very upset at me and the situation.

I feel like there might be a little bit – I think there might be a little bit of both. I think the thing that it's going to be the worst part about it is that I haven't been truthful with him.

I feel like there might be a little bit – I think there might be a little bit of both. I think the thing that it's going to be the worst part about it is that I haven't been truthful with him.

Okay. Okay.

Okay. Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. That sounds like an amazing approach.

Okay. That sounds like an amazing approach.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Hey, how are you, Dr. John?

Hey, how are you, Dr. John?

Um, well, actually that part is not the, at least to me, it's not like the worst part because we've listened to the Ramsey show for a long time. Um, but it's under a thousand.

Um, well, actually that part is not the, at least to me, it's not like the worst part because we've listened to the Ramsey show for a long time. Um, but it's under a thousand.

I am doing good. I'd like to be doing better.

I am doing good. I'd like to be doing better.

Yeah. He thinks that we have, he thinks that we have money in the account and virtually we have none.

Yeah. He thinks that we have, he thinks that we have money in the account and virtually we have none.

We've got medical bills that I have budgeted before or that have worked into a budget that I've just worked up. But it's just not living... Within our means. Okay.

We've got medical bills that I have budgeted before or that have worked into a budget that I've just worked up. But it's just not living... Within our means. Okay.

So I am needing and wanting to be truthful and honest with my husband about some credit cards that he doesn't know about, as well as how much money we actually have in our bank account versus what I have told him that we've had in our bank account. Um, and so I just, how bad is it? It's not that bad, but, um, I just, I've, I've been reading your book.

So I am needing and wanting to be truthful and honest with my husband about some credit cards that he doesn't know about, as well as how much money we actually have in our bank account versus what I have told him that we've had in our bank account. Um, and so I just, how bad is it? It's not that bad, but, um, I just, I've, I've been reading your book.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yes.

Yes.

He definitely has.

He definitely has.

Okay.

Okay.

Yeah, that's totally fair.

Yeah, that's totally fair.

Oh, my gosh. That sounds awesome.

Oh, my gosh. That sounds awesome.

Yes, I am.

Good, how are you?

Okay, I guess I'll start. So our overall question is just, kind of like needing advice on how do we figure out when to have kids or if we should wait given our medical school and residency timeline.

Um, I guess for background, I'm a second year medical student and, um, he is applying to medical school right now. Um, and so it just, it's kind of complicated.

Yeah.

Yeah, correct.

I would...

I want to live a non-anxious life and I just don't want to keep this secret anymore. And my original plan was to like get on top of things and then everything would be fine. But now I just, I want to be, I want to be a good wife. I want to be open and honest. And I just, I need his help with the finances and, um, we've got to start from ground zero, I think.

Sort of.

So a big part of the whole question is just... We're Christian and we're trying to balance our values of, you know, wanting to have a family. And that is, to me, definitely the most important thing in my life other than the Lord. And it just makes it complicated to do both.

It's, I think it like, it's more of like, like our faith is, it just, um, is very important. Not that it's like necessarily the most important. Um, but to me it feels more important than my job.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I don't, I don't know. Okay. Um, it makes it hard with school for sure. Um, it's, I mean, my husband would definitely say that I struggle with like finding ways to like keep going with school because it's just like, I'm kind of having a hard time balancing it.

Um, I want to have like four to six kids eventually. Okay. And I want to be a good mom, um, and a good wife. Um, And yeah, I mean, I want a job eventually, but I just, I don't, and like part of me likes the idea of like being able to help people and the, um, have like a, I don't know, like mentally stimulating job, which not that that is the only one out there. Um, but, um, yeah. Yeah.

A significant number of people.

My family, mainly.

Yeah.

Siblings, maybe.

I guess not.

I'm 24. Okay.

Four months yesterday.

Yeah.

Yeah, I guess I'm afraid that eventually I couldn't go back, or I wouldn't because it would be too much money, or X, Y, Z, and I would regret it somehow.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, I like those sometimes.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I guess I would say I'm a stay-at-home mom. And so I kind of take care of all of the household duties and everything. you know, taking care of our kids and kind of everything that I can so that he can just work. And then, I mean, of course he helps with the kids and he helps with the household too. But I think he wants to be helpful with that too.

And we've talked about it over the years, but it just like, we talk about it and then like nothing ever happens. And so I'm just kind of like left holding the bag.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, it could be both.

I'd say sort of me because he is so gung-ho about me being home and raising our kids. But I think that there's still a part of me that just wants to prove that I can do this, I can handle this, and be the CEO of my home and show them that I can do this, I guess.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's the big part.

I had just worked administrative in some doctor's offices. Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

Yes.

No, I love it. I feel more fulfilled than I ever have in my entire life.

So it started last year. Last year and around the summer is when we decided that it's possible for me to be a stay-at-home mom. I had my first child earlier in the year last year. Um, and so I didn't really realize or know how to manage our money at that point.

Um, as like we, as we went through the rest of 2023 and we had gotten to a point where we were down to zero and zero, like you didn't owe anybody any money. Say it again.

Like our bank account was zero.

Yeah, and it kind of blew up, and I was like, okay, well, I can fix this. I can get on top of it. And I have a hard time, on a side note, I have a hard time saying no to him because he doesn't know what we don't have, and he wants to get this or do this, and so I don't want to be the officer of being like, no, we can't do that.

i am needing and wanting to be truthful and honest with my husband about some credit cards that he doesn't know about as well as how much money we actually have in our bank account versus what i have told him that we've had in our bank account uh-oh how bad is it

I guess I can't balance that well.

Yeah.

Exactly.

Yeah. How's this going to go? I don't fully know. I think ultimately it will work itself out, but I think that he's going to be very surprised and very upset at me and the situation.

I feel like there might be a little bit – I think there might be a little bit of both. I think the thing that it's going to be the worst part about it is that I haven't been truthful with him.

Okay. Okay.

Okay.

Okay. That sounds like an amazing approach.

Yeah.

Hey, how are you, Dr. John?

Um, well, actually that part is not the, at least to me, it's not like the worst part because we've listened to the Ramsey show for a long time. Um, but it's under a thousand.

I am doing good. I'd like to be doing better.

Yeah. He thinks that we have, he thinks that we have money in the account and virtually we have none.

We've got medical bills that I have budgeted before or that have worked into a budget that I've just worked up. But it's just not living... Within our means. Okay.

So I am needing and wanting to be truthful and honest with my husband about some credit cards that he doesn't know about, as well as how much money we actually have in our bank account versus what I have told him that we've had in our bank account. Um, and so I just, how bad is it? It's not that bad, but, um, I just, I've, I've been reading your book.

Yeah.

Yes.

He definitely has.

Okay.

Yeah, that's totally fair.

Oh, my gosh. That sounds awesome.