Kevin Ryan

I was never a big fan of kielbasa, but they ran out of sausages.

Kielbasa's great.

I ate them out of sausage one week, so I had to pivot over to the fucking kielbasa.

All we got is tofu dogs.

All right.

Yeah, imagine seeing that and then asking me out on a date.

I know, and I used to feel I would get that juice on me, and I would smell it.

But hours later, I'd smell it hours later working, and be like, I smell like a Polish fucking meat factory.

Cartilage or something.

Something's got to be rerun through the grinder.

It looks like baby teeth.

All right, we got to switch gears.

We'll do our other kielbasa stories on a later date.

Let's see.

You say you're a part of the Secret Santa, and there's a $50 minimum on the gift.

Now, what if you find something that's over $50...

but was on sale making it $30.

Is it trashy to count that as hitting the set minimum, or is the classy move not counting it as hitting the minimum and buying a second smaller gift?

I mean, listen, in the... What are you doing?

I was looking at my phone.