Kevin Spacey
speaker
258 appearances
1 recordings
1 series
first heard Jun 2024
last heard Jun 2024
Kevin Spacey’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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I mean, I've been working so hard over these last seven years to have the conversations I needed to have, to listen to people, to understand things from a different perspective than the one that I had, and to say, I will never behave that way again for the rest of my life.
But I have had a sexual life, and I've fallen in love, and I've been so admiring of people that I I mean, I'm so romantic. I'm such a romantic person that there's this whole side of me that hasn't been talked about, isn't being discussed, but that's who I know. That's the person I know.
It's been very upsetting to hear that some people have said, I mean, I don't have a violent bone in my body, but to hear people describe things as having been very aggressive is incredibly difficult for me. And I'm deeply sorry that I ever offended anyone or hurt anyone in any way. It is crushing to me.
And I have to work very hard to show and to prove that I have learned, I got the memo, and I will never, ever, ever behave in those ways again.
And by the way, not to take anything away from my accountability for things I did where I got it wrong, I crossed the line, I pushed some boundaries. I accept all of that. But I live in an industry in which flirtation, attraction, people meeting in the workspace and ending up marrying each other and having children.
And so it is a space and a place where these notions of family, these notions of attraction, these notions of It's always complicated if you meet someone in the workspace and find yourselves attracted to each other. You have to be mindful of that and you have to be very mindful that you don't ever want anyone to feel that their job is in jeopardy.
or you would punish them in some way if they no longer wanted to be with you. So those are important things to just acknowledge.
Yes. And I also understand that there are people who met me and spent a very brief period of time with me but presumed I was now going to be their mentor and then behaved in a way that I was unaware of that they were either participating or flirting along or encouraging me without me having any idea that at the end of the day they were expecting something. So these are about relationships.
These are about two people. These are about... people making decisions, people making choices. And I accept my accountability in that. But there are a number of things that I've been accused of that just simply did not happen.
And I can't say, and I don't think it would be right for me to say, well, everything that's ever been accused of is true because we've now proved that it isn't and it wasn't. But I'm perfectly willing to accept that I had behaviors that were wrong and that I shouldn't have done. and I am regretful for.
Well, to some degree, I would say that I have been able to trust my instincts on that and that I've most of the time been right. But obviously in the last number of years, not just with people who've accused me, but just also people in my own industry, to realize that, oh, I thought we had a friendship, but I guess that was about an inch thick and not what I thought it was.
But look, one shouldn't be surprised by that. I have to also say, you said a little while ago that the world had canceled me, and I have to disagree with you. I have to disagree because for seven years, I've been stopped by people, sometimes every day, sometimes multiple, multiple times a day.
And the conversations that I have with people, the generosity that they share, the kindness that they show, and how much they want to know when I'm getting back to work tells me that while there may be a very loud minority, there is a quieter majority.
I think betrayal is a really interesting word. But I think if you're going to be betrayed, it has to be by those who truly know you. And I can tell you that I have not been betrayed.
Yes. And I have spoken to many of them. Privately. Privately, which is where amends should be made. Were they able to start finding forgiveness? Absolutely. Absolutely. Some of the most moving conversations that I have had when I was determined to take accountability have been those people have said, thank you so much, and I think I can forgive you now.
I think if I were to go back that far, I probably would have found a way to not have been as concerned about my revealing my sexuality and hiding that for as long as I did. I think that had a a lot to do with confusion and a lot to do with mistrust, both my own and other people's.
That I didn't find the right moment of celebration.
You know, Ian McKellen said after 40, he was 49 when he came out. 27 years he'd been a professional actor, being in the closet. And he said he felt it was like he was living a part of his life not being truthful and that he felt that it affected his work when he did come out because he no longer felt like he had anything to hide.
And I absolutely believe that that is what my experience has been and will continue to be. I am sorry about the way I came out, but Evan and I had already had the conversation, I had already decided to come out. And so it wasn't like, oh, I was forced to come out, but it was something I decided to do.
And by the way, much against Evan's advice, I came out in that statement and he wishes that I had not done so.
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