Kristen Joy Hoadley

Under duress, I might add.

I went to the Cabbage Patch Doll place because my, you know, Susan decided she wanted to get the kids a Cabbage Patch Doll.

I was all excited about it.

We went to Babyland General.

I did.

It was kind of cute.

Yeah.

Well, you can, you pull them out of the cabbage.

Like you pick your one and it pulls out of the cabbage.

Yeah.

It's, they're no longer actual human beings who pretend to be doctors.

At least I didn't see that whole thing.

I went to Babyland General when we first moved here as a kid.

Our dad took us to Babyland General and we saw the whole show, not doctors, nurses, the maternity ward, the whole thing.

Well, as a 13-year-old boy, I didn't really find it too interesting, right?

I was like, what the fuck are we doing here?

Why is my mom still under the delusion that we want a Cabbage Patch doll?

My mom bought us Cabbage Patch dolls from Santa when we were like, when they first came out and they were the craze and people were beating each other up over those things back in the late 80s or mid 80s or whatever it was.

And I never wanted a Cabbage Patch doll in the first place.

Never asked for it.