Booty Babies
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What unusual pregnancy scenarios are discussed in this episode?
Jamie.
Yeah.
How cold is it out there?
I'm wearing two pairs of panties so my lips don't get chapped. You tell me.
On this episode of the Commercial Break.
I've got two ass babies going on right now. I sit on them all the time. You ever had an ass baby, Chrissy? Longer gestation period, hemorrhoids, a whole nine yards. But this ass baby's a little bigger than that ass baby. You want to take a look? You want me to show you? No. No? Okay. You think Jizzle Drizzle will get mad at me?
The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now.
Welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is the wife of the master of the jizzle-drizzle, Kristen Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Kristen.
Best to you, Brian.
And best to you out there in the podcast universe, including Jeff. And hey, six times the charm for starting this episode. That's right.
Yeah.
Literally started the episode six times. Take six. Take six. Uh, do you know about the craziness around the Stanley cups? Yes. What in the good fuck are we all doing with our lives?
I don't know.
I'm sticking with, what are we doing?
I'm doing my Yeti.
I don't care. I mean, I like a big cup and I also have an emotional attachment to my cup, so I'm not casting stones. I'm not throwing stones in a glass house because I understand how attached we all are to our water babas. Now they are saying there's bad news all over the place about water containers in general. There's like microplastics all in the plastic water bottles. They've been testing them and they have 10 times more plastic than we ever imagined floating in the water because of it. Yeah, this is great. We're all full of fucking microplastics. And now these Stanley cups are causing trouble left and right. They went from like $72 million in revenue in 2019 to $750 million in revenue over the last fiscal year.
Which is an insane amount of growth.
I saw that. It was all based really on social media, right?
These TikTokers, they go crazy. And then they put out this pink cup at Starbucks, of which each Starbucks gets 10 or whatever. And people are beating each other up over a fucking cup. A cup that contains water. You know there's a lot of things that can hold water, guys and girls. I mean, we don't have to go get $50 gallon. What is it? What they call it? Gallon's time day or something because it's holds almost a gallon of water. Why do we need these things? Pilots, people who do work in the middle of the summer where they don't have access to cold water. The roofers, you know, contractors, guys and girls who really need to be drinking water, a lot of water, and they don't have access to a tap right next to them or filtered water, whatever it is.
Those are the kind of people who need Stanley cups.
How do Stanley Cups relate to today's discussion?
Not house moms high on Vicodin waiting in Starbucks at six in the morning for them to open for this. They get a lottery number. So they get a Stanley Cup. And listen, if you're one of those people, what are you thinking? What are you doing? Stop it. Stop it. People are beating each other up literally for a pink Stanley Cup. It's a fucking cup.
Jesus. Maybe a cup is better than a beanie baby, though.
Yeah, but they're still doing the Beanie Babies. People are still going crazy over Beanie Babies. I just went to the Cabbage Patch Doll place. Under duress, I might add. I went to the Cabbage Patch Doll place because my, you know, Susan decided she wanted to get the kids a Cabbage Patch Doll. I was all excited about it.
You went to Babyland General?
We went to Babyland General.
Did you use a cyst and a birth?
I did. It was kind of cute.
I have it on tape. It's pretty cute.
Yeah. Well, you can, you pull them out of the cabbage. Like you pick your one and it pulls out of the cabbage. Yeah. It's, they're no longer actual human beings who pretend to be doctors. At least I didn't see that whole thing. I went to Babyland General when we first moved here as a kid. Our dad took us to Babyland General and we saw the whole show, not doctors, nurses, the maternity ward, the whole thing. Well, as a 13-year-old boy, I didn't really find it too interesting, right?
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What unusual pregnancy scenarios are discussed in this episode?
0:00–2:49
2
How do Stanley Cups relate to today's discussion?
2:49–4:48
3
What is a cryptic pregnancy and how does it differ from normal pregnancies?
4:48–6:30
4
What are the implications of having multiple uteruses?
6:30–8:29
5
How do the hosts react to the concept of 'no bones babies'?
8:29–11:53
6
What is the audience's perspective on the guest's claims?
11:53–15:03
7
What humorous anecdotes are shared about Dr. Phil?
15:03–17:18
8
What conclusions do the hosts draw about the medical claims made?
17:18–1:00:33