Macy Yo

Why don't we hear one?

So I'm from Tacoma, Washington, and they, yeah. But yeah. That's right. Throw that shit up. They steal weird shit out of your car there. Because I got in my car one day and I noticed somebody had rummaged through all my shit. And I wasn't really that upset because, you know, I didn't really have anything in there. And then I realized something else was missing.

Those motherfuckers stole my floor mats. I was sitting there like, what kind of fucking maniac steals floor mats? What a psychopath. Then I went to the Subaru dealership to get some new floor mats for my Outback. Fucking $80 to get new floor mats. I was like, fuck this shit. I just went outside and stole somebody else's floor mats.

That lesbian was probably like, what kind of maniac steals floor mats?

Oh. My grandpa's name is Jerome. Yeah, but what color is he? Uh, very, very, uh... White.

What's up? I grew up in Alaska back in the 80s. Yeah, they used to tell us all the time that we were gonna get nuked. All the time they would be like, hey, if the Russians drop a nuke on us, jump under your desk. Even as like a first grader, I was like, that's fucking dumb. And then I smoke a weed and I found out why they tell you that, there's this Japanese dude

And he had to go to work out of town, and he had to go to Hiroshima. And he saw a big flash, and he was like, oh, shit. And he jumped under his desk, and he survived. And then, like, a couple days later, he had to go back home to his hometown of Nagasaki. Yeah, he saw it again. He was like, oh, fuck, and jumped under his desk again. So I was all high, and I was like...

How come we don't just build big desks over our houses?

Sorry, I was a little winded. I had to come from the farthest point.

Is that true? Yeah. She slurs she doesn't smoke weed, but I remember her growing it as a kid.

Me and my friend Mason, he got tickets, and so he said we should come down and try to get on.

I hope he does better than me.

I'm a stay-at-home dad, and then I started doing comedy when my daughter got older, so.

Yeah, I was just sitting back there going my daughter would love the band over here.

Yeah, my my girl She got a really good job. So what's that job? She sells cruises like luxury cruises and

To people all over. She's like a super agent for a cruise line. Okay, absolutely.

No, she usually stays at home with the kids.

Give them some shout outs. I used to smoke opium blunts.

I had hurt myself, and I was on Vicodin, and then I just progressed to just smoking opium and blunts.

No, I started getting real opium from this Chinese dude and just breaking it up and putting it in the blunts.

I think he could tell I was already popping lots of Vicodin. So he was like, this guy looks like he got it in his eye.

I partied with a Seattle Mariner one night and then he got kicked down the stairs the next day by his wife and couldn't play baseball.

Um... I don't really remember.

People in Tacoma, not known for their... I got introduced to wax, like the weed wax. Right. So I just started putting that in my blunts.

Yeah.