Maura

Like, leave me out of things.

Because, well, it was never said, but I don't think I was his person.

Like, I don't really know where I came from.

Sometimes he'd look at me with disgust.

And anyway, so when I told Mam how he'd hurt me, she didn't do anything about it because I suppose she thought she was in the wrong with him and let him do what he wanted as an apology.

I was collateral, I suppose you'd say.

Yeah, I... I suppose.

And I was never really right because of that.

I didn't do well in school.

I was just scared all the time.

The person who is meant to protect you is the one you're frightened of.

Then, oh God...

After his funeral, I got drunk at home and it all came out.

And so my name was dirt with my family and the neighbours and the carton twitchers.

But it was like a release, like a realisation.

No one was going to help me.

So I had to help myself.

So I went to work in Dublin, got a little flat, started to lose contact with everyone.

And then I got lonely and drunk again.

And well, Billy came into the world.