Melissa Vranjes

Honestly, it happens.

It's scary.

But also if you're searching for more intense stuff, more intense things, it's like what you searched three months ago, six months ago, isn't doing it for you anymore and you need something more intense.

Mm-hmm.

That could mean that there's a problem.

If your partnered sex life has become disconnected, lacking intimacy, you don't have desire for your partner, you're not getting turned on by the sex that you're having with your partner, porn can play into that.

And I think when there's secrecy and shame around it, you're not being open around using it.

And there's just like, yeah, that kind of betrayal secrecy aspect to it as well.

Yeah, I think watching it less.

changing to audio erotica or something like that or seeking help you know if you feel like you've become addicted to it then I think it's worth like talking to somebody about it like if it's like okay I'm not going to watch it this week or next week and you find yourself watching it there could be a tendency that you're relying on it to experience arousal.

Yeah, I think that porn isn't evil.

And I don't think that the question is like, should I watch it?

Shouldn't I watch it?

It's just like, what is my intention around my porn usage?

Is there an openness if I'm in partnership with somebody?

Is there an openness around it?

And also, like, how is it impacting my sex life?

Is it impacting in a positive way?

Is it impacting in a negative way?

And what do I need to tweak and change up around it?