Melissa Wood-Tepperberg

And I think that is where I'm at right now today where I'm, like – I am so done just like ripping off these masks and really just being so radically transparent with myself, but also with people who are ready to do it for themselves too. Because it's not just for me and I think that's where this work has fueled something in me that I've always known was in there since I was a little girl, but it's

And I think that is where I'm at right now today where I'm, like – I am so done just like ripping off these masks and really just being so radically transparent with myself, but also with people who are ready to do it for themselves too. Because it's not just for me and I think that's where this work has fueled something in me that I've always known was in there since I was a little girl, but it's

It's this choice every single day, like to this day. It's like I'm choosing, I'm choosing to stay devoted to myself.

It's this choice every single day, like to this day. It's like I'm choosing, I'm choosing to stay devoted to myself.

So instead of like, for me, instead of focusing on removing one thing that really helped me when I was in it, and still when I feel overwhelmed, it's like, what can I add in to help like make me feel just an ounce more at ease. And when my therapist started really calling me out on things, then it was like, okay, I can't even lie to her. Like, I just have to be honest.

So instead of like, for me, instead of focusing on removing one thing that really helped me when I was in it, and still when I feel overwhelmed, it's like, what can I add in to help like make me feel just an ounce more at ease. And when my therapist started really calling me out on things, then it was like, okay, I can't even lie to her. Like, I just have to be honest.

So it was like, that schtick was old. I couldn't do that anymore. But then I was finding, I was feeling this, like, I need to be told. Like I need to be told what to do. So I started seeing a health coach and I remember the first time I walked in and I was like, okay, give me the diet. I was in that mindset of like, tell me the thing, I'll do it and then I'll see results.

So it was like, that schtick was old. I couldn't do that anymore. But then I was finding, I was feeling this, like, I need to be told. Like I need to be told what to do. So I started seeing a health coach and I remember the first time I walked in and I was like, okay, give me the diet. I was in that mindset of like, tell me the thing, I'll do it and then I'll see results.

And I was trying to lose weight because I wanted to be a model. And at this point I had gotten signed by a top agency, but it was like, I lost like 15 pounds.

And I was trying to lose weight because I wanted to be a model. And at this point I had gotten signed by a top agency, but it was like, I lost like 15 pounds.

And I lost 15 pounds and then it was just this long road of torture because I thought that I was very into fitness and very into wellness, but my relationship to myself was still so disconnected that I was looking outside of myself for all of the resources. So I was taking what a trainer would tell me to do. You needed to do 45 minutes of cardio and then

And I lost 15 pounds and then it was just this long road of torture because I thought that I was very into fitness and very into wellness, but my relationship to myself was still so disconnected that I was looking outside of myself for all of the resources. So I was taking what a trainer would tell me to do. You needed to do 45 minutes of cardio and then

45 minutes to an hour of strength training. And I became psychotic with that. So it was like every day, an hour of this. And I was working out two hours a day, writing down every morsel of food. It was so obsessive.

45 minutes to an hour of strength training. And I became psychotic with that. So it was like every day, an hour of this. And I was working out two hours a day, writing down every morsel of food. It was so obsessive.

It was exhausting. It was unwellness.

It was exhausting. It was unwellness.

So when I was in the height of really just – it was like micromanaging every single thing. I did get really, really thin, but it was unhealthy and I just looked – it was painful.

So when I was in the height of really just – it was like micromanaging every single thing. I did get really, really thin, but it was unhealthy and I just looked – it was painful.

No, I didn't feel healthy. And then – plus when you're – suffering from needing disorder, the flip can happen too, where then I started gaining a lot of weight. Yeah. I was like, when I was doing all the crazy workouts, hit workouts and running myself into the ground, I was actually at my heaviest.

No, I didn't feel healthy. And then – plus when you're – suffering from needing disorder, the flip can happen too, where then I started gaining a lot of weight. Yeah. I was like, when I was doing all the crazy workouts, hit workouts and running myself into the ground, I was actually at my heaviest.