Michael Malice

I mean, there are YouTube videos of fat people falling down, and they're really funny.

My friend Jesse just told me a great Norm Macdonald joke. And this is a good litmus test joke because he says a certain group of people lose their minds and a certain group of people just stare at you. And he goes this kind of, so I'll tell you the joke. This is Norm Macdonald. Guy walks into a bar and he sees someone at the bar who has a big pumpkin for a head.

My friend Jesse just told me a great Norm Macdonald joke. And this is a good litmus test joke because he says a certain group of people lose their minds and a certain group of people just stare at you. And he goes this kind of, so I'll tell you the joke. This is Norm Macdonald. Guy walks into a bar and he sees someone at the bar who has a big pumpkin for a head.

My friend Jesse just told me a great Norm Macdonald joke. And this is a good litmus test joke because he says a certain group of people lose their minds and a certain group of people just stare at you. And he goes this kind of, so I'll tell you the joke. This is Norm Macdonald. Guy walks into a bar and he sees someone at the bar who has a big pumpkin for a head.

And the guy's like, dude, what happened to you? He goes, oh, you never believe this. I got one of those genie lamps. And this genie, he's like, well, what happened? He goes, well, the first wish, you know, I wished for a hundred million dollars. He's like, yeah, did you get it? He goes, yeah. He goes, it was in my bank account. It was fine. He goes, all right.

And the guy's like, dude, what happened to you? He goes, oh, you never believe this. I got one of those genie lamps. And this genie, he's like, well, what happened? He goes, well, the first wish, you know, I wished for a hundred million dollars. He's like, yeah, did you get it? He goes, yeah. He goes, it was in my bank account. It was fine. He goes, all right.

And the guy's like, dude, what happened to you? He goes, oh, you never believe this. I got one of those genie lamps. And this genie, he's like, well, what happened? He goes, well, the first wish, you know, I wished for a hundred million dollars. He's like, yeah, did you get it? He goes, yeah. He goes, it was in my bank account. It was fine. He goes, all right.

Well, the second wish, I wished to have sex with as many beautiful women as I wanted. He goes, did that happen? He goes, yeah, it was amazing. He goes, then what? Well, I wished for a giant pumpkin head. So there's a certain mindset that will just be staring at the screen. And that is, I mean, there's so many levels why that's funny, at least to me.

Well, the second wish, I wished to have sex with as many beautiful women as I wanted. He goes, did that happen? He goes, yeah, it was amazing. He goes, then what? Well, I wished for a giant pumpkin head. So there's a certain mindset that will just be staring at the screen. And that is, I mean, there's so many levels why that's funny, at least to me.

Well, the second wish, I wished to have sex with as many beautiful women as I wanted. He goes, did that happen? He goes, yeah, it was amazing. He goes, then what? Well, I wished for a giant pumpkin head. So there's a certain mindset that will just be staring at the screen. And that is, I mean, there's so many levels why that's funny, at least to me.

Did you ever see him with Carrot Top on Conan O'Brien? No. Making fun of Carrot Top? No. This is probably the best talk show clip of all time. He's on with Courtney Thorne-Smith. She was on Melrose Place. And Conan O'Brien's the host. And Courtney's talking about how she's going to be an upcoming movie with Carrot Top. And Conan's like, oh, what's it going to be called?

Did you ever see him with Carrot Top on Conan O'Brien? No. Making fun of Carrot Top? No. This is probably the best talk show clip of all time. He's on with Courtney Thorne-Smith. She was on Melrose Place. And Conan O'Brien's the host. And Courtney's talking about how she's going to be an upcoming movie with Carrot Top. And Conan's like, oh, what's it going to be called?

Did you ever see him with Carrot Top on Conan O'Brien? No. Making fun of Carrot Top? No. This is probably the best talk show clip of all time. He's on with Courtney Thorne-Smith. She was on Melrose Place. And Conan O'Brien's the host. And Courtney's talking about how she's going to be an upcoming movie with Carrot Top. And Conan's like, oh, what's it going to be called?

And she's like, doesn't have a title yet. And Norman goes, oh, I know what it should be called. Box Office Poisoned. And they're all laughing and she's like, no, no, no. Like the working title is chairman of the board. And Conan goes, do something with that smart ass.

And she's like, doesn't have a title yet. And Norman goes, oh, I know what it should be called. Box Office Poisoned. And they're all laughing and she's like, no, no, no. Like the working title is chairman of the board. And Conan goes, do something with that smart ass.

And she's like, doesn't have a title yet. And Norman goes, oh, I know what it should be called. Box Office Poisoned. And they're all laughing and she's like, no, no, no. Like the working title is chairman of the board. And Conan goes, do something with that smart ass.

I think he is one of those rare comedians. who you really feel like he's talking to you directly. He feels like he's winking at you in the audience. And he's like, can you believe I'm doing this? It's like he almost, he feels like he's, I don't want to say imposter, but he's more a member of the audience than he is a member of the people on the stage.

I think he is one of those rare comedians. who you really feel like he's talking to you directly. He feels like he's winking at you in the audience. And he's like, can you believe I'm doing this? It's like he almost, he feels like he's, I don't want to say imposter, but he's more a member of the audience than he is a member of the people on the stage.

I think he is one of those rare comedians. who you really feel like he's talking to you directly. He feels like he's winking at you in the audience. And he's like, can you believe I'm doing this? It's like he almost, he feels like he's, I don't want to say imposter, but he's more a member of the audience than he is a member of the people on the stage.

You know, Roseanne got him his first job. Roseanne, you and her have been hanging out. I got it. Oh my God. Talk about Thanksgiving. When you are talking to Roseanne Barr and making eye contact with this person, it is, I can't even describe it. It's just like, holy crap, Roseanne Barr's talking to me. She is, I've said this to her face, pathologically funny. Like, it does not turn off.